mim-alif-ya

biarkan

2011-12-21T09:57:00.001+08:00

Persetankan segala tanggapan manusia disekeliling.mereka berhak berkata apa saja.segala macam tuduhan membabi buta.biarkan mereka..

Sakit kepala memikirkan semuanya...tidak berbaloi sama sekali..

Oh Tuhan.hanya engkau yang mengetahui..

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Newborn Baby

2011-12-15T10:01:00.003+08:00

Welcome to the world baby boyAween and Anuar = Rayyan

Hairulrayyan b. HairulanuarHospital Ampang12December20113.93 kg8.10 am

p/s: kussss semangat!!

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

2011-12-15T09:06:00.003+08:00

I heard That you're settled down ,That you found a girl And you're married now
I heard That your dreams came true Guess she gave you things I didn't give to you
Old friend Why are you so shy Ain't like you to hold back Or hide from the light
I hate to turn up out of the blue Uninvited But I couldn't stay away I couldn't fight it I'd hoped you'd see my face And that you'd be reminded That for me It isn't over
Never mind I'll find , Someone like you I wish nothing but the best for you Too.. Don't forget me
I begged I remember you said Sometimes it lasts in love ,But sometimes it hurts instead Sometimes it lasts in love ,But sometimes it hurts instead

You'd know How the time flies Only yesterday Was the time of our lives We were born and raised In a summer haze Bound by the surprise Of our glory days
I hate to turn up out of the blue Uninvited But I couldn't stay away I couldn't fight it I'd hoped you'd see my face And that you'd be reminded That for me It isn't over
Never mind I'll find Someone like you I wish nothing but the best for you Too.. Don't forget me I beggedI remember you said Sometimes it lasts in love, But sometimes it hurts instead
Nothing compares No worries, or cares Regrets and mistakes They're memories made Who would have known.. How bittersweet this would taste

Never mind I'll find Someone like you I wish nothing but the best for you Too.. Don't forget me
I beggedI remember you said Sometimes it lasts in love ,But sometimes it hurts instead Sometimes it lasts in love ,But sometimes it hurts instead Yeah, Yeah..

p/s: lagu masa gaduh.

Beanies

2011-12-09T10:38:00.001+08:00

i miss this boy so much..He loves my beanies that I buy for him

Love.love.

Trip Part 4

2011-12-09T09:50:00.006+08:00

Still on Day 3 : After we rest out at Poring Hot Spring, we move to Kinabalu Park. There's nothing much there, as we didnt plan for climb up Gunung Kinabalu. So we take a round there and get some strawberry ice-cream. Yummy!

Pondok Timpohon : Entrance to those who want to climb up Mount Kinabalu.

Pasar Kundasang. Sell fresh flower and goods.
After that, we move to Town for buy some pearl, brooch and local foods. Kuih cincin and etc.

Back in the airport already, our flight delay about half and hour and we safely arrived KL around midnight. Arrived home around 3 am and take a GOOD sleep because the next morning I have to travel to Malacca. Weee

As Raya Haji and I seriously no plan to take a bus to going back my village but I have to face it. Arrived at TBS around 9.00 am and I get my ticket at 11.15 am. Darn. Exhausted.

p/s: Back to back travel. Tired but interesting!

Trip part 3

2011-11-24T10:01:00.020+08:00

Day 2 and 1/2 Day 3

We still on day 2 at Sabah. After clean up and get our pray at State Mosque, we move and have a evening hang out at Signal Hill. Look nice from up here. Then, we are super starving. So we get our dinner at Tanjung Lipat, Likas KK. Nyum Nyum.

Signal Hill, KK

TLC , Likas

Fathin.Dzatin.Husna.K.Erma.Din.Atan.
After we finished our dinner, we move with 2 cars (4wD and Viva) heading to Kundasang. Top Hill. Supposedly K.Erma follow us, but she unable to get leave so we let the others is guiding us. We move around 9 or 10 pm, and arrived around 12 to 1 am. So, we heading to TM Resort for a night and get a sleep. Here is cold and im freezing like hell. Wayyy too cold more than at Genting.

We spend our night at TM Resort Kundasang.Soo cheap! Ya lah, staff TM :)
Eh, we already move to Day 3. Our Last day! SOoo sad.
Morning of Day 3, our tourist guiders drive us Heading to Poring Hot Springs. Its 18 km far away from the place we stay and about 20 minutes to arrived.

Poring Hot Spring, Kundasang

Macam jungle tracking tau tak. Fuh!!

Sessi merendam kaki and FISH SPA for FREE. :)

We cool down or feet in hot water :)

Seriously, at this point we are already exhausted, starving and everything but it was as great experience.

p/s: Geli nak mampus masa fish spa. bukan anak ikan. ini bapak ikan.

Trip part 2

2011-11-23T13:08:00.022+08:00

Day 2 : Island babe!!

Day 2 : We off to Island. we choose pakej of 2 Island. Mamutik and Manukan.

As we have voucher from Hotel, we get cheap price la. :)

Off with boat.

Way to Mamutik Island.

Tadaa.

i love the beach!

Then, we move to Manukan Island. Here we spend more time longer than Mamutik Island.

Ok. Let the picture talks.

Lalala.

yay! mandi! Eventho, i'm not planning to get myself wet but i cant stand the feeling. HAHA. so, i just ran to the beach and YAY! :)

Ready to take off from Island and going back to KK.

Safely arrived Jesselton Jetty.

p/s: Day two with sunburn faces. oh NO!

Trip part 1

2011-11-09T11:51:00.019+08:00

Early Nov. It was planned more than a month. A few things happen actually but it was at 1st and also happen in the middle of the trip, but like who cares. Admit that I'm a little bit emo when this sucks things happen but when think back. Its VACATION okay. So, have fun and enjoy. Right?

our flight delay around 10pm. Safely arrived midnight.temporary stay at Tabung Haji Hotel.Get our 1st car and have our brunch.

Sabah State Museum !#^$E%(!@&%(!@

don't ask further on this.we don't have any idea where to go..

we move on to Tanjung Aru for a evening walk.

then we move to Salut for Gerai BB. Having our Lokan Bakar, Kelapa Bakar and Puding Kelapa. Yummy!!!

We move on to Nexus Karambunai. Resort. It was SUPERB!!

Night. We hang out. Talking and Chatting at Waterfront.

p/s: our 1st seem like suam-suam kuku but puas hati jugak la. thanks to my sabah's friends.

The Polaroid

2011-11-01T09:47:00.004+08:00

McD Tambun.

Morning 30/10/2011

LostWorld of Tambun

Petting Zoo

Lost World of Tambun

Notakaki: Thanks sayang-sayangku. SGF.

Him

2011-10-31T22:03:00.003+08:00

Me and HimParit >> Tambun, Perak29102011

Notakaki: Thanks for the lovely bracelet. Love u

Farewell

2011-10-28T07:22:00.007+08:00

The third week of october, around 19 until 21st oct, I was surprise by one news which is i'm not sure it will be a good news or even worst. I just seriously shocked. As I have training at TMTC, I was told tru email by colleague. Would i smile or what? I seriously no feeling. I'm not sure if I need to sad or happy or what. After a few days from the news, until today 28th which is his last day I'm kinda feel sad somehow. Yes, eventhough he was very menyakitkan hati but he actually teach us a lot of thing. To be more independent and smart. A few things, he might spoiled like claim, leave and etc. but overall on job thingy, he is okay. on 25th, we have a lunch together. Me, Husna, Shafinaz, Ieda Bumelo, Zuhara and Suzie. After randomnly pick up, we end up eat until full at Pizza Hut Taman Tun. A talk talk between us and eat. Thanks Devin.

K.zu seems busy with the sauce and cute Ieda Bumelo

Ex-team, K.pinat and still K.Husna. *candid*

RE HLB, K.suzie and Ex-Boss Devin.

Thanks Devin for the treat.

Devin,
Sorry and Thanks for Everything!Good Luck in ur future at GP!

Notakaki: tanak bagi ucapan yang panjang. barang yang lepas jangan dikenang. Anggap itu semuanya satu pengajaran.

Last day

2011-10-27T15:36:00.001+08:00

Hari ni last jumpe Bos.

Thanks!

2011-10-27T15:11:00.002+08:00

Thanks K.Safura for the treat

Pepper Lunch at Pavilion

Movie : Real Steel

Btw, Congrats for your promotion ye.. Tamau bising-bising lagi. Your salary even greater than my bos tau. :P

Notakaki: Alhamdulillah.

Tutti Frutti

2011-10-27T12:04:00.002+08:00

Dayah!!!

Me :)

Notakaki: Sedap.sedap.Tutti Frutti. Ice cream sikit je. yang mengarut tu yang banyak.

Simple yet Memorable

2011-10-16T22:17:00.009+08:00

Simple yet memorable.

It was last minute planning. All the cupcakes, secret recipe, goodies and everything. Thankful. At last is was success. Boleh la. Bukan nak ramai-ramai pon yang datang, but everything is just simple and nice. Eventho at that time, i have so-called training until late evening, i'm manage to help out a few. Hihihi.

The birthday card a.k.a banner.

I'm not supposed to be in the picture. Btw, thanks k.ween!

The cupcakes. Treat from me to little twins.

Happy birthday Sayang!

Mak Ngah help out before cake become worst. Heee

The baby sitter. Ibu Yati and Elis.

Clockwise: Umi. Mama. Mak Ngah. Irfan. Wawa . Jaja

Elis and the twins.

Jaja and Wawa.

Notakaki: I love u both!

3rd Birthday

2011-10-14T10:56:00.003+08:00

Happy 3rd Birthday

Najiha & Najwa

notakaki: aunty love u much!

Oh, its hurt!

2011-10-13T16:34:00.004+08:00

01041988

22101986

mengade-ngade tengok gambar ni.lepas 4 tahun, dah makin kurang nak bergambar sangat. malas. cuma masuk hari ni, dah dekat 3 bulan tak jumpa dia. maka, tersentuh sikit hati ni. rindu sesangat kt si tongek. setakat dengar suara through phone and text. 3G pon tidak. Phone dia macam chipsmore, kejap-kejap tukar macam-macam. Oh, I miss u lah!

notakaki: hope that we will meet this 28th...

Dugaan

2011-10-11T17:23:00.005+08:00

01041988

Just now, we like having a few conflicts and drama. Yell in the phone, cries and everything that related to sadness, anger and dunno-what-to-say. Maybe he too hush to counter back everything and might be from my mistake as well. He already warn me like a million times, but I keep doing the mistake. Is it a mistake? Yes, It was a huge mistake for meeting someone that not supposed to be. Yes. Admit, it was my mistake. Hurm, Berdoa sangat that one day aku akan lupakan semua yang dah berlaku and just proceed with the future life. InsyaAllah and I hope everything will be okay and fine after this. Harap semua yang sudah berlaku menjadi satu pengajaran untuk aku dan petunjuk di masa hadapan agar lebiih berhati-hati. I really want to forget everything and just go on with my life. I will focus on my life, my career, my friends, my family, and my love.

notakaki: no matter what happens, he still and will be forever my other half. InsyaAllah.

Birthday Bash

2011-10-08T22:12:00.005+08:00

Cakes.KFC.Twister Apple and Orange.Polkadot muffins.

I feel very grateful. For a while waiting my sister Surya get back from Segamat and one day delay, at last success full celebrate my mom's becoming birthday and belated birthday of Sarah. Buy a KFC chicken, new recipe Tom Yum and Zinger also Cheezy Wedges and etc. I am very thankful for this. Even though a few things happen lately, but i keep strong in mind and heart to overcome everything. InsyaAllah. After eats and everything, time to give away present. For mummy, new blouses and for sarah, FCUK perfume. Hope u like it. I just pick it randomnly.

“There always come

a happy day in a year

no matter who you are

what you are doing

Its decorated with

guaranteed happiness,

love, fun and memories”

Happy belated birthday Sarah 25091982

Happy becoming birthday Mak 1010957

notakaki: Semoga panjang umur dan dimurahkan rezeki.

Sweetheart

2011-10-08T16:10:00.007+08:00

Our Sweetheart

Ayah.Ibu.love Asyraaf.

Be a good son ye! Amin.

notakaki: nak baby! :)

Reason of everything

2011-10-07T09:47:00.004+08:00

my Hero!

This is the reason why i going back hometown this week. I really miss this baby boy so much. Early morning, woke up and directly play with this boy. We had a great talk, teasing, laughing and everything. Awww. So best! Ya Ya. great talk? Hee, in my own way and when he reflex with his voice, I know that he understand what i story about. He smile and I am soo blessed to God. Comel sangat dia macam MakSu dia, heeee. Yes! Syukur kepada Allah s.w.t.

"Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough."

notakaki: Teringin nak amik anak angkat or should I kawin 1st then got my own baby?

Me, myself and I

2011-10-07T03:48:00.003+08:00

A Promise to Myself

To be so strong that nothing can disturb my peace of mind.

To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person I meet.

To make all my friends feel that there is something worthwhile in them.

To look at the sunny side of everything and make my optimism come true.

To think only of the best, to work only for the best

And to expect only the best.

To be just as enthusiastic about the success of

Others as I am about my own.

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the

greater achievements of the future.

To wear a cheerful expression at all times and give a smile

To every living creature I meet.

To give so much time to improving myself that I

have no time to criticize others.

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear,

and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

To think well of myself and to proclaim this fact to the world,

not in loud words, but in great deeds.

To live in the faith that the whole world is on my side,

so long as I am true to the best that is in me.

notakaki: other's people's opinion of you does not have to become your reality!

Ini LAST

2011-10-06T18:43:00.003+08:00

Memang tak nak hidup dalam emo emo dah. but, kali ni i am over my limit. ini last entry EMO. like seriously. Now, at TBS, Terminal Bersepadu Selatan waiting until 7.30 pm for my bus to arrived. Im going back hometown. Now, I am seriously pissed off, cuma hanya mampu bersabar. Kita tak mampu jadi sempurna maka kita tak payah nk sempurnakan orang lain. Kita tak mampu nak menolong orang lain, di kala kita juga tengah susah dan dalam kesempitan hidup. Kalau kita mampu, kita tolong. Sumpah. Aku tak mampu nk berkata-kata. Segala tuduhan dan segala tohmahan yg dilemparkan aku telan hidup-hidup, hanya argument dalam perkataan dapat dikatakan walhal hati ni tak pernah terlintas niat nak lukakan hati siapa-siapa. Aku cuma seorang manusia yang ada tahap kesabarannya. Cuma kali ini aku terlalu marah. Aku doakan kebahagian, kesejahteraan dalam segala apa yang kau lakukan dalam hidup kamu. Ku redha dengan segala pemikiran mu terhadap ku. Aku redha.

notakaki: mulut cakap blah, hati tetap sayang.

Live in a lies

2011-10-06T09:26:00.007+08:00

Live in a lies

Buat report on Thursday Morning.Dengar lagu. Teringat all the nightmares and I am crying. I am crying sbb entah....maybe just teringat dengan kisah-kisah lama yang berlaku tanpa menggunakan otak. Sedih. We just an ordinary human kan? kan? Who is perfect? Tolong angkat tangan! I make mistakes too. I don't know sampai bila I will live in a lies and it just karma? I'm not cheating to anyone, I means like NOW. but, from the past. Yes. I seriously regrets. Now, think someone is use and cheat on me, not sure but I think it is KARMA. Yes, Tuhan itu Maha Kuasa. Berhak untuk segalanya.

Halo?
Remember those walls I builtWell, baby they're tumbling downAnd they didn't even put up a fightThey didn't even make up a sound
I found a way to let you inBut I never really had a doubtStanding in the light of your haloI got my angel now
I swore I'd never fall againBut this don't even feel like fallingGravity can't forgetTo pull me back to the ground again
I can feel the heat back. I can see the light again.Pray it won't fade away.

Love cupcakes.

notakaki: I need some PURE love. Allah s.w.t.

Doakan yang Terbaik

2011-10-04T11:19:00.003+08:00

middle choclate cake : Asyraaf

Anti - Clockwise Cupcakes ( Start with the rose on top) : Mummy sarah, Daddy Fendi, Sister Surya, Me!, Grandpa and grandma errr another one is LOVE.

Saya doakan yang terbaik untuk kakak saya. Harap semua yang terjadi ada hikmah. Little Asyraaf is just get too much love from the family. It is precious and very lucky. Alhamdulillah. Harap semuanya berjalan dengan lancar dan dapat hadapi dengan hati yang tenang. InsyaAllah.

Hadapi dengan tenang ya Ibu Maisarah.

notakaki: i just can't show my sadness if it about family. ya Allah.

Life Beginssss.......

2011-10-02T21:33:00.018+08:00

" I've been working hard so longseems like pain has been my only friendMy fragile heart's been done so wrongI wondered if I'd ever heal again"

Yes. I admit. This is what i feel now. Pain. I guess i work so hard for the past few weeks and unfortunately all the real colleague didn't see at ALL what i have been work hard for. They might listen from my voice, saw from the email replied and the phone calls that I made but they still don't have any idea what i FACE everyday. NO IDEA i guess. They might imagine but still can't see it on real. Bukan nak pertikai on this. I admit this is my job. As a resident engineer, I MUST entertain customer 1st. Thats for real and important. Penat okay. Tiring and exhausted. Whatever bebelan and complaints pon, I still kene buat , which sometimes i don't have a time for rest, time to lunch, manage my things and been rushing for my zohor and asar prayer. pathetic kan? sedih. I do need a life guys!

Ok. For the past almost 2 years before, I've been a hypocrite and such person. Like seriously. I don't want to talk much about my career and job scope or wutsoever because I think no ones will understand. So, please be in my shoes. One day is enough i guess. However thanks to Zaman as he keep saying that RE is only kambing hitam. Thanks, u are soo dont-know-what-to-say. For all i know, i work hard. I do my job. I try to satisfied all everyone, internal and external. I know its hard and difficult, but i try my best. The very very best!. I think. InsyaAllah. Semoga Tuhan tahu segala pengorbanan ku. Amin.

For the time moves, i try to be an optimist and positive. Yes. Matter of career, love, relatioship, financial and life. Think positively. Wutever happens in life is always for a reason. The most important things is that God is love me, he give me obstacle and challenge in my life. He want to see how i face that stuff by myself. I am very thankful for that. Alhamdulillah.

" Yesterday has come and goneand I've learnt how to leave it where it isAnd I see that I was wrongfor ever doubting I could win
Life's too short to have regretsso I'm learning now to leave it in the past,and try to forgetOnly have one life to liveso you better make the best of it"

"Today my Life begins"

notakaki: whoever thought a day gone so wrong would be so lovely.

october

2011-10-02T02:11:00.011+08:00

october

yes, this is the month. my lovely october. before comes october, i pray for something good and nice happen for this month. yes, like seriously. october, falls on my closest family members birthday. my mommy. my brother in law. myself. my favourite twin. my little notti kid, nurin. my beautiful lenglui karen. whut else, my SGF Nadia and my favourite ex. okay, faveret ex yes. yes, we've been in love since standard 5 okay. HEEE. wutever.that is sooo not important. I hope that this month, please be good to me..from the sake of health, financial, relationship and works.. please be good. InsyaAllah.

One Republic - Good Life

"When youre happy like a fool, let it take you over

When eveyrthing is out you gotta take it in

Oh, this has gotta be the good life"

Mama.Nurin.Karen.Jaja.Wawa.NadiaWani.Halim.Fendi.Myself.

"Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional"

Happy Becoming Birthday

Mye and little princess Nurin Batrisyia 06102010

Mye and Karen 06101988

Daddy Fendi 20101984 and little Asyraaf 23072011

My life teacher. My mummy.10101957.

Najiha and Najwa. 14102008.
Nadiawani 18101987
Abdul Halim Ahmad 20101986
Myself 22101986

"They say that age is all in your mind.The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body."
Stay young and keep a healthy life ya!

notakaki: "Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end"

budak chantek

2011-09-30T14:26:00.003+08:00

budak chantek.

siapa?

yang kanan ke kiri?

notakaki: all woman in the world should believe in themselves. Yes, you are beautiful.

cupcakes

2011-09-30T13:59:00.003+08:00

nyum nyum

the most i ate during Maybank Level 43 Jamuan Raya which as usual I am a total stranger. Thanks to those who invite me. Lovely. Cupcakes. I love it. Yummy and beautiful.

"When you looking at the cupcake, you've got to smile"

notakaki: :)

Kejap pun tak apa!

2011-09-30T10:05:00.003+08:00

Salam Hari Jumaat semua.

Alhamdulillah. Gagah dan selamat hingga ke penghulu segala hari. Jumaat.Yes! This week is very thankful. It was a hectic week, like seriously. Hari-hari super duper banyak kes and issue. I'm pushing toooo harsh and now today i am totally weak. But! i still want to post an entry. Just one. Still on syawal mode, but it almost ended. Yes. Selamat Tinggal Syawal. Ok. back to story. I text budak chantek, lengluiii... Hui Yi as she got training like near my office. Not so dekat, but boleh laaaa. I promise to have a lunch with her. It supposed to be on Tuesday but delay on wednesday. And there goes wednesday afternoon. I rush for a lunch like 12.30 and arrive at 1.00 pm. Eat at Semua House Foodcourt and chit chatting here and there. Also attend the training is Na Ellah, Kak Sha, and Global Team As and Mek Yah. There's nothing precious than meeting a friend. As kadang-kadang bosan jugak duduk kt office, bukan tak close dgn customer. but, we have limitation. Not we, but i think only them. I am so okay. Ada a few yg I'm closed with but macam tu je la. boring kan hidup. Nak gossip, need to email and tweet. Or phone call. Hurm.. Whatever it is life must goes on kan? But, kept thinking sampai bila la jadi Resident Engineer ni...Let the God decide.

Mye.Huiyi.naEllah.

As and Mek Yah. Borak tak hingat nk pandang camera.

With newlybride, Kak Sha. This week reception at the Guy side, Mersing. InsyaAllah saya datang.

notakaki: dapat jumpe kejap pun tak apa. alhamdulillah.

Open House

2011-09-13T08:34:00.019+08:00

First and foremost. I know its kinda late to wish an official Hari Raya. Cewah. Macam VIP. So? Ngeee. Just a pic snap by my BF at Melaka and little bit edit here and there.. and goes like this. Ok x? Gedik ke? HAHA. wutever la. So, To All Muslim.. Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri. Ok. Tipikal things related with Hari Raya is Open House. Yes, Open House. On Sept 10, one of my colleague organize an open house. Feels great!!! As i am the one and only that is very rare to meet the other colleaguessss..yes, like seriously! Ok OK. I'm staying alone at the customer site la. That's the reason! :)

Ucapan Hari Raya dari penaja. kah kah kah. oh, thanks to BF for the pics. Lovely! :)

Now, back to the pictures on Mrs Junaidah Open House.

Location : Taman Sri Sementa, Jalan Kapar, Klang.

Date : 10 Sept 2011

Peace : Thanks to Karen Tan! :) Yeah, I'm wearing black! Thanks to Bandung for the lovely baju.

My team, Kak Husna.

Floater.Expert Team. Karen Tan.

My partner since July 2009, Farhana. Otai FSI and Energy.

Heeee, peace in K.June kitchen. Banyak tau Kak June masak. Nyum. Nyum.

Still at Kak June kitchen. Cute sangat fridge magnet :)

With Nurin Batrisyia Zulkifli. My abang little princess.

Mr.Zulkifli with his princess, Nurin! *EH, look at the back. That's me! :)

Hot!! Shafinaz.Hana.Karen. Me.

Sukriyyah * becoming bride* . Me. Husna. Shafinaz. K.Pinat's friend. K.Husna little sister.

Yay. Ijad's Charlie Angel.

Ijad.Abg Zul.Halim. Ieda.

Karen.Huiyi. Na Ellah.

Pian.Ijad.Halim.Kak June and Alia. Ok, yang nampak sipi2 tu is Fadli.

Karen.Ieda.Na Ellah * the Red baju kurung. Husna. Mye. Hui yi.Shafinaz. Hafiz.

Thanks to K.June for the lovely food. Satay. Nasi.Laksa.Ayam.Tembikai. Delicious! To all officemate, Enterprise 1. Plaza Vads, Level 7. Thanks! Its nice to meet you guys which better through phone, email and Fb! yes. seriously! I feels great! Thankssss! The important things is, i meet someone that is totally rare. You know who you are. Thanks for being nice. I appreciate it much! :)

Nota Kaki : I need a miracle.

Kepada Tuhan, aku berserah.

2011-09-07T20:59:00.006+08:00

when things getting complicated and confused

yes. it start with a small things. tak pasti dengan diri ini. whats wrong. I am scared with eight. NOt sure what eight is all about. Ok. Ignore about the eight thingy. Lapan. I dont know why so suddent eight comes in the picture. Lerrr.. Ever since my holiday starting at the end of last month until yesterday, i feel something is not right. Everyday i'm facing with flu and asthma. Like seriously. Need mommy to woke up late night to take cre of me. Inhaler pam semua berjalan lancar but need a little massage. yes, after that I will be okay. But, who can face to sick like almost everyday. Small things. Just a minor flu. Minor fever. Minor cough. Everything is just a common sick. Ya. Ya. I am totally worried. My BF is so damn worried. I am sick like everyday and like three or four times a months. Even the doctor i met this morning, did notice that i am sick very frequently. Yes. I am. I am notice about myself. I am lost if sick dekat KL. If I were in Kota Tinggi with parents, i will more secure. Yes. with daddy and mommy. Now, alone back in KL. Even i tell to my aunt n cousin, they just can only nodded. Oh, really. Soo sad. That's all. my BF suggest a few, like having bekam. My cousin ask me to meet to Ustaz, treatment for sinus. Can i have more suggestion? What else shud i do? I taken honey every morning but now already stop taking is as I didnt found the right one like previously. What else? I'm lost.
When things getting complicated. yes, complicated. I don't know what shud i do next. I am really sick and exhausted. Things getting confused also. Yes, confused. I am seriously confuse with my own sick. Like previously, I 'm having bronchitis and viral infection. Now? Sinus and Tonsilitis. Oh, I am seriously lost. Most people will said, ala kecik je sakit. But, be in my shoes. I am spoiled to do any job when I sick. I am not having major like tumor or cancer but when minor things happen everyday equals to MAJOR okay. Bukan nak menbanggakan penyakit sendiri cuma saya redha dengan ketentuan ini. Saya hanya bercerita untuk melepaskan segalanya yg terbuku di hati. I just want to let it go. Please go. Sick, please go.

Kepada Tuhan aku berserah.
Ya Allah, berilah petunjuk dan permudahkan lah urusan ku. Sihatkan lah tubuh badan ku dan jauhkan lah aku dari penyakit yang merbahaya untuk hambamu ini. ya Allah, kuatkan la semangatku menghadapi segala dugaan penyakit yang ku terima dan masih tidak dapat dikenal pasti ini. Ya Allah, Engkau lah Maha Kuasa dan Mentadbir sekalian alam. Berilah petunjuk kepada hambamu ini ya Allah. Amin ya rabbal alamin.

notakaki: get well soon to myself.

My man

2011-09-02T22:47:00.003+08:00

Tiba-tiba geli pulak cakap 'My man' yucks! hahaha. like mommy always pesan, u both don't have any 'ikatan' kan. i know u both are soo closed. Everything u do, please behave. Ye la mommy. I know! Heee. but u know how the feeling grows after it kept for 4 years. Its been almost 3 months never meet him, i think la.. Not sure the exact duration but who cares la kan? Wutever it is I really miss this boy? this man? Emm, this BF. :)

dear BF,

Selamat Hari Raya

Maaf Zahir Batin

Sorry for Everything ye! :)

notakaki: Jom raya sama-sama tahun depan. Mau? :)

Everything is new!

2011-09-02T22:22:00.006+08:00

Salam Aidilfitri 1432H

Syawal ke -4

Yes, everything is new. Its now about stuff. Its not about new langsir, new clothes, new shoes, or anything else. Its about new member in the family. Everything is different from previous year! I was sooo blessed and really thankful to God for giving me this precious gift even though i knew that i'm kinda late to experience this feeling. Ya Ya..having brother in law and 1st anak sedara. Yes, i'm late to experience this. So what?! HEEE. Maaf zahir Batin ya! Selamat Hari Raya. Yes, its new on Raya 2011. What else should i say! I am so thankful to God. Ya Allah, aku sangat bersyukur! Alhamdulilah.

My brother in law : Affendi and Sarah with baby

Here's the baby in the house : Asyraaf Affendi

My Family. We just Seven!

Ok. Please be serious and look at me. The Failed one. OMG.

So, freestyle! Heee :)

notakaki : I missed someone. Where are you sayang. :'( sob.sob.

Aidilfitri 1432H

2011-08-30T22:52:00.012+08:00

Purple on 1st Syawal 1432H

Salam Aidilfitri 1432H

All Muslims in the World

Maaf Zahir dan Batin

Salah silap harap dimaafkan

Terkasar kata, bahasa perbuatan dan segala misinterpretation harap dimaafkan.

Semoga Syawal kali ni membawa seribu satu rahmat kepada anda semua.

InsyaAllah.

Amin.

notakaki: This year Aidilfitri, I am so blessed. Raya with brother in law and new niece Asyraaf.

God bless. Alhamdulillah.

MyBean

2011-08-26T10:43:00.001+08:00

Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.

notakaki : " We only part to meet again"

Apology

2011-08-17T10:15:00.002+08:00

Apology

tak semua comeback boleh kita buat seperti yang di harapkan. i admit it's been a long long time i didnt update this blog.Now, i am back to draft more what happen in the past where i dissappeared from the blog. yes, I admit I'm taking quite time to wrote it. Seriously.

A few things and conflict happen lately and I have no idea to handle it. Is it my mistake or just a coincidence? I am not sure. In the holy Ramadhan, i'm trying hard to think it positively and just accept with all my heart. I dont have time to quarrel and argue about. I've just no time for it. Lately, I am more accepting things rather than argue about it. But, it depends on issue. Ya Ya.. Fine. When somethings happen to me, the more I focusing of doing Ibadah and back to Allah s.w.t. Yes, Almighty Allah.

Ya Allah, ampunkanlah dosa hambamu ini. Terimalah taubat ku ya Allah. Sesungguhnya hidup matiku ditanganmu ya Allah. Permudahkan lah segala urusan ku ya Allah. Lembutkan lah hati ku dan hati hamba mu ya Allah. Aku berdosa denganmu ya Allah. Ampunkanlah dosa hamba mu yg kerdil ini ya Allah. Engkau yang Maha Pengampun dan Maha Mengasihani..

p/s: I am just being Myself.

it was not right

2011-08-16T10:21:00.002+08:00

merenung masa depan

It was not right

Everything is not right. I dont know why. Is it all my past mistake and sins been haunted me back again. ya Allah. It was total regrets ever. I makes mistake and its huge. I spoiled up myself and a few ppl that i love. For the past, i seriously dont have any idea what happen or is it about NAFSU? Is it? I just dont want the memories to be told and discuss. I am total delete it.Seriously.

Semua manusia atas muka bumi ini melakukan kesilapan. Tiada manusia sempurna.

I'm Still looking for the bright side. Searching for goods and beneficial thingy. Trying hard to give all the best to others but they still judge me wrongly. Instead of being nice to ppl, they say i'm GEDIX. Am i? I'm just being nice in work, being profesional on job career. Being a leader really challenge me. When being nice, get scold. Being to hush, i was being HATED. SO, which one should i be? Tell me and help me. I'm trying hard to satisfiy both party. Instead of customer, it is boss and my team. Which one should i be? Ya Allah, please guide me.

In this Holy Ramadhan, i'm back to God Allah s.w.t. Pray that everything is just fine and back to normal plus I will be strong mentally and physically. Like mom and daddy always said " adik, ingat Tuhan! ingat TUhan. apa saja yg berlaku solat penting, ingat Allah. Balik kepada-Nya"

yes, Mom.

p/s: pic of my BFF at Feringgi Beach Resort, Penang. 2009.

Comeback

2011-08-14T06:21:00.002+08:00

its been a while

its August and almost half of it plus its Ramadhan. Suddenly i've the feels to pop up back in my own blog. Its been a while rite? What had happen in the past of like 3 months since May until now, i am seriously no idea. Lots of things happen. How would i remembered everything? I dont know but try my best to catch up all the past and wrote it. Its just a matter of memory and wish it will be a lesson to learned. aite.

p/s: semangat membara membawa kebaikan ke keburukan? tak pasti......

my first niece

2011-07-25T08:33:00.005+08:00

1 day after born

15 days after born with Umi

introducing my 1st niece

Asyraaf B. Affendi

23rd July 2011

4.52 pm

1.68 kg

Regency Specialist Hospital, Pasir Gudang ,Johor.

Dr. Thokha Muhammad

gosh, its been a while i'm not looking up my blog.. a few ppl keep asking for update.. haiya. lazyyy!!!

p/s: see u next entry.

Fareeda : Nyata Jelita

2011-05-12T11:36:00.000+08:00

segala macam tudung aku beli. dari HAJRA.paling feymes dan feveret is ARIANI. Then, comes to FAREEDA. cik pinut yang rekemen. menarik dan lawa. pegi cari butik FAREEDA. serious lawa. sebab tgk cik pinut pakai cantik. Maka, ia lawa lah. keh keh..

Jom vote officemateku Cik pinut. Cari kt FB, Fareeda..Nyata Jelita then like. Lepas tu, cari picture as below name Siti Shafinaz and click LIKE. senang je!

jom vote!!

selamat hari ibu

2011-05-09T09:02:00.005+08:00

ibu

Rohaini Abdullah

A mother of three daugther, Maisarah Maisurya and Maizura

A wife to Husband Ismail Alwi

My mom and Daddy

Mom, masa Maisarah Wedding 25 Sept 2010.

its already late i guess to wish but who caresss...everyday is feel like mothers day.. parents day..kan kan? it just specific that 9th May 2011 is entitle as Happy Mothers Day. Mom, or at home i call her as Mak! Mak, adik love u soo much. I am forever remembered when u cry through the phone when i say that I was sick and admitted to ward and being so far away from you... I keep saying to you " Mak, i'm okay je la..xde ape.." but the fact is i am suffering alone at home..Hurm..I miss you mom......
Mom"Happy Mother's Day" means moreThan have a happy day.Within those words lie lots of thingsWe never get to say.
It means I love you first of all,Then thanks for all you do.It means you mean a lot to me,And that I honor you.
But most of all, I guess it meansThat I am thinking ofYour happiness on this, your day,With pleasure and with love

notakaki: love u mom.

be strong

2011-05-06T16:15:00.005+08:00

sejak menjak lepas pulih dari sakit.ini ayat yang terima dari orang sekeliling dan paling mengejutkan ialah boss aku. " be strong mai.be confident. if you dont have the confident yet, it would developed day by day." ye lah bos!entah aku tatau nak cakap apa.lepas pulih, ayat nak marah tak ada dan hanya cuma ayat yang frustrated dan mengecewakan ( sama je kan). ayat itu je yang keluar dan terus meleleh air mata ni terlalu menahan marah, menahan perasaan dan bukan dendam cuma ini hak sebagai pekerja. ( obviously ini pasal kerja la okay?) so, be strong. yes! i am trying now! please lah okay! i think i've been bullied. not sure by who but from someone observation saying that i am toooo KIND. yeke? am i? entah. but, now i feel it. now i feel it that i'm just the black sheep. tapi, black sheep aku pon i bring the names of the company okay? please notice that! ingat tu.

day by day. i trying hard develop myself a self confidence to face true life after been suffering in the hospital. seriously i am traumatized. ive been off day from work for 3 weeks and when come back to office, i starting to blur, low confidence and kelam-kabut yang pasti. i wish i would built up the confidence to face my life. i know that life is such a lies but thats the fact that i need to face it. sedih kan? whatever it is life must goes on! face it mai! i wish that mom and dad would stay with me here, but i know it will never happen...homesick. be strong mai!.. mom and dad everyday keep remind me to take care of myself and tabahkan hati.. insyaAllah. i wish sister also here too taking care of me but it definitely not happen..the thing is i wish my BF is keeping me company or take care of me even we are so far away but it not happen actually which is i am so frustrated. i dont know whats on his mind? Motor? Photograph thingy? Studio? Shoot pictures? am i included? Am i? I wish i am but i never feel it. Not even once. sedih kan. orang yang kita sayang, yang kita harap kita dapat hidup dengan dia, orang yang kita sangka boleh jaga kita kala susah dan senang tapi hampa. hampa sangat. i feel like been left out. I love him so much but I am sad because of him. I only got him. Only him in my heart. Soo sad....

maizura,

do not be afraid to fail.

be strong.

everything happen is for a reason.

insyaAllah.

Hope and pray everything will be okay.

notakaki: image courtesy from google -google.

One Lovely Blog Award ( Edisi MC)

2011-05-04T15:50:00.003+08:00

waktu-waktu sekarang kira macam waktu sakit aku.bukan nak official atau nak sangat sakit. tapi, memang tak berapa nak sihat. so. edisi MC. Sayda ada tag, blog award. Report pending masa MC dah selesai, so ada la free time sikit. nah!

lovely sangat ke ni? hik hik.

Here are rules to abide accepting this award

1. Post linking back to the person that gave you the award
2. Share 7 random things about yourself
3. Award 15 recently discovered blogs
4. Drop them a note and tell them about it

1. Post linking back to the person that gave you the award .camni ke sayda dino. nah!
2. Share 7 random things about yourself alamak. tujuh? banyak nye?

hurm.baru-baru ni aku masuk ward.alhamdulilah da sihat. best sangat kat sana sebab SGF datang. sayda.ecah.affa.nani.shuze.nadiawani.norman.wanita. tenkiu sangat-sangat! (gaya mcm seronok je masuk ward..dem!)

dulu berdua dengan kakak aku maisurya kat KeyEll ni.skang da sorang-sorang.agak susah la sebab bukan ada keta.takat menumpang. bosan.bosan.sebab tu dua 3 hari ni asyik melalak je sebab homesick.haish.

AF da minggu keberapa tah.tapi, rumah kaca dekat AEON AU2 tu baru 2 kali pergi.padehal dekat nak mampos dengan rumah. eh, perlu ke? sebab aku jakun tgk artis2 ni..lawa dan ensem siot. dem!

emo? memang da sebati dalam hati. tapi, berusaha untuk kurangkan marah ni.nasib xde HBP.aritu sakit. HBP aku normal je..nasib nasib. lepas ni tahan marah macam mana? setakat ni, nangis je la. macam pagi tad, aku marah sangat dengan sorang mamat ni. terus nangis. LOL. "cry cry if u stumble into a mess......"

ive made lots of mistakes and sangat-sangat regret..kalau la aku boleh turn back the time kan? i wish i never knew him.seriously... knowing that person is just makes my life suffering and he keep detsroying my life. Pray and Hope that miracle will happen. Karma does exist. What you gives is what u get back. Allah itu Maha Kuasa. Ingat!

teringat masa sekolah rendah. geng dengan budak OKU. belajar bahasa isyarat.macam-macam. sampai terbawak ke kelas, last-last kene ejek dengan budak laki.kuang ajo. sek ren dulu, pnah gaduh dengan cikgu kelas darjah 6 sebab aku tak dapat pegi jamuan kelas..sebab aku kene amik hadiah pelajar terbaik subjek apa tah. ada 2. wahh.berlagak. masa ni aku rasa jamuan makan penting dari amik hadiah mengarut yang takat kamus je. HAHA. masa sek ren ni, cinta monyet aku. darjah 4 kenal, darjah 5 bercinta sampai Form 1. fuh fuh.. yang pasti dia sangat hensem. HAHA

lately ni, lagu glee -gwynelth paltrow (betul x eja? ) forget you tu dah berapa kali ulang sampai aku paksa anak spupu aku yang kembar tu ikut menyanyi dan menari..paksa sampai boleh. haha. nasib diorg comel, cuba kalau aku...huduh...

ok.cukup 7.yes

3. Award 15 recently discovered blogsapa nak tag.banyak gilo.
adik Zul.Mira.K.Fara.K.Yanie.Erin.ZukhirmanApis

4. Drop them a note and tell them about itkejap lagi lah...........tgk la. :P

notakaki: just to kill the time.

saya trauma

2011-05-04T14:50:00.003+08:00

saya trauma.

saya trauma dengan keadaan sekeliling. sejak kejadian sakit masuk hospital saya jadi trauma. sumpah. setiap kali berada di luar kawasan bebas. saya pegang jantung saya.saya pegang paru-paru saya.saya cuba untuk tahan nafas supaya kurang habuk, asap yang saya hidu. saya cuba mengagahkan diri saya. saya cuba. hari ini hari ke-2 saya berkerja dan saya sedang makan hati dengan team saya dan boss saya. saya sudah sihat tapi masih dalam recovery process. saya tak faham kenapa boss macam celaka sangat semalam dan hari ini back-up saya macam sial. opps. tad saya meluahkan perasaan dengan K.Una. rupanya banyak cerita lain yang terjadi selama 3 minggu saya tak berkerja.hari ni saya suffering period pain yang melampau tapi saya gagahkan diri untuk siapkan report saya.
saya trauma dan saya kesal. ada sesetengah pihak yang mengambil kesempatan dgn saya.saya baru lepas sembuh dan baru juga dapat bonus. tak ada plan pun bonus tu, tapi saya dah labur ke mana entah. nak tolong dan sayang punya pasal. melayankan diri pun lebih kurang aje. saya ni sapa tah pada dia atau saya je yang rasa digunakan sekarang?

bila cakap sayang, saya rasa hipokrit.sangat.

saya trauma dengan kehidupan saya.

notakaki: macam mana saya nak cari seorang suami yang persis ayah saya. semua boleh diharap. mana nak cari?

Siapa mintak sakit ni? Siapa?

2011-04-30T00:05:00.001+08:00

petang tadi appt dgn specialist doc. ok. Doc tapi Dato'. So, called him Dato'. banyak bende dia explain plus aku tanya macam-macam pasal kejadian lepas. sinus lepas Ct Scan, ada but tak serious. X-ray, ada bronchitis. Kalau aku google bronchitis dalam wikipedia, ada related to viral infection. Mungkin dari situ lah bacteria atau virus yang menyerang buat batuk kahak dan selsema aku berdarah. Dato' pulak suruh aku refer pada Doc E & T, Dr Aminudin yang so-coincidently is NadiaWani's uncle. HAHA. kene refer die sebab Dato suggest aku utk operate tonsil aku yg bermasalah tu. As adv dari Doc tak bertauliah di sekeliling aku bak kata Nadiawani mostly tak bagi aku buang tonsil ni, So she advice me to consult Doc 1st no matter what and then baru discuss macam mana next plan. yes, betul jugak ckp Nadia. hurm. pasal bronchitis tu, aku perlukan orang or Doc yang boleh explain bagi aku faham. Aku ni Doc aku Dato' tapi aku mcm bangang je bila depan dia. HAHA. kes sel darah merah aku pulak satu lagi. RBC lebih dari WBC masa aku sakit aritu. sebab aku G6PD. apa itu? google. and becoming Dr shuze sangat terkejut sbb aku ada bende ni sbb selalunya happen to the boys, male. very rare pada girls. Nak buek camano, since I was born. Haih. G6PD ni ada allergic macam-macam. yang pasti aku tak boleh kene ubat gegat, makan kacang parang, ubat other than Dr prescription, spray ridsect dan ada list yang sepatutya. If langgar pantang larang jugak, one of the effect is causes RBC count aku la problem. Kalau nak explain, nantilah.

pening dengan penyakit sendiri.aku tak pernah mintak. G6PD tu since born. tonsil problem since i was primary school then. RBC, bronchitis, Viral Infection? Tak pernah sesekali mintak dalam hidup ini. Sumpah. Asthma? Itu satu lagi kes sejak secondary school when i was exposed much to dust. Alhamdulilah asthma kurang dah sekarang.

banyak pulak list penyakit. sapa mintak? Tuhan bagi. Ini semua satu dugaan dalam hidup. bak kata BF, Tuhan suruh kita beringat bila kita ditimpa malang begini. ya Allah, kuatkan lah imanku menghadapi segala dugaan dalam hidup ini.

ya Allah..

the thank you part 2

2011-04-29T08:45:00.000+08:00

thank you part two

thank you goes to my BF, my sayang. sepanjang saya sakit, he is very worried. I know he having problem with the transportation, but die gagah jugak dgn his brother car. He came along from Muar with Faliq. Teman di Hospital. Walaupun kejap sebab he came at the time I discharge but I really appreciate and glad that you came sayang. That night, he take care of me and make sure i take my meds and have a good rest. The next morning, we take our breakfast together and get something for lunch and have a walk just to make my mind free as I was hospitalized and stay at home almost 2 weeks. So, I need fresh air. Thank you sayang. I love u so much.

Dear BF,

i love u so much.

the thank you

2011-04-29T08:41:00.000+08:00

sepanjang 3.5 hari di hospital. i was lucky and blessed being visited by friends, cousins and relatives. bertuah badan. tima kasih banyak yang datang melawat. kedatangan korang makes me happy and cheer up my day. Terima Kasih ya Allah.

SGF yang datang. sayda.wanita.affa.nani.ecah. norman also, he is taking the pic.

shuze came by when i'm taking my lunch. also with her is Nadiawani. Tq korang!

The most precious and ya Allah, aku berterima kasih dikurniakan ibu dan ayah yang memahami. Mak ayah dua kali datang, once in the middle of the week and 2nd is when i admit to Hosp. Tenkiu mak ayah! I love u sooo much!

Mak setia menunggu. Ayah juga. They both stay a night with me after my sis surya take care of me at first two nights. Then, she go to Shah Alam for work.

My sis sarah and Fendi, they mms out picture and wish to get better soon. Tq sarah and Fendi.

My sis surya and little Jaja. Maisurya, take care of me 2 days and stay night with me. Tq maisu! i love u!

The most thankful to Mak Long, Kak Ween, Abg Nuar and little twins who always there for me. Who sent me to hosp, clinics and so many more. It was priceless. Tq All. Tq MakSu Gayah and Pak Usu also K.Lim and the boys who come visiting me. There goes Yanti also come visit me. Tq Zukhirman, K.june and K.pinat yang tolong masa awal-awal sakit esp Man, Tq banyak-banyak sebab tlg settlekan masa hari sakit. To everyone wishes for better, thank you a million. Tq mendoakan saya sembuh. Alhamdulilah dan saya bersyukur ke hadrat Ilahi kerana masih hidup dan sihat. Amin.

sesungguhnya sakit itu penghapus dosa.

the cure

2011-04-28T08:30:00.000+08:00

sambungan entri sebelum ni.

after a few days, my body temperature back to normal. BP pun normal. Doc came in to the ward and inform that i can be discharge. Sangat sangat happy! Eventho kene jugak last antibiotics at that evening kol 6.00pm, i was discharge at night . At this time, my BF just arrived from Muar with Faliq. Thank you love!

sebenarnya saya diagnose as Viral Disease. but this is more general. If more specific aku tak sure but confirm virus is infection in my blood and my lungs which makes White blood cells counts greater than red blood. Tak normal okay. And after a few meds and treatment, blood count back to normal. I was official normal and stable but still need a precaution especially if go out to public, need to wear mask. oookay! freak but i have to do for my health. aite? Plus, i cannot simply take any meds from anyone and need to have Doc prescription. I also have to stops taking jamu and whatsoever. Even vitamins and etc, i need to break for a while. And after settle up the bills, need to pay 242.50 and selebihnya by PMCARE and get my result and my meds, I ready to take off!!

in kat ward. masa ni dah bersemangat sikit. Alhamdulilah.

my bed.my ward.419. single room. Thats my mom!

this is the meds that need to take constantly. banyak siot.tak tgk dalam plastic lagi.T_T

setelah 3.5 days in Specialist Hosp Ampang Puteri, i am okay now and still Doc gives a week for rest. Mom da suh pegi keje, while boss said to rest a week and early May started working. ok. So, I decide to rest at home. Mom and dad went back to johore after I discharge, while my BF is waiting for me until the next day. Thank you sayang.

Alhamdulilah.

the pain

2011-04-27T11:00:00.014+08:00

when the pain goes bad...

sambungan entri sebelum ni

bila sampai di Specialist dalam jam 4.00 ptg, terus berjumpe dgn Dr. tak ada appointment so, need to wait. Then, goes my consulation along my aunt also in the room. After checking and discussion, he decide to admit me to the ward. After submit letter, need to wait available room. As room is full, wedecide to go back home. Around 9.00 pm, got a phone call to come to Hosp and admit to my ward. My aunt, my cousin along with little wawa is waiting for me until the nurse came to do whatever they supposed to do. Meanwhile, mom, dad and sis surya is on the the way to my place. Masa awal ni, temperature body from 40.8 and reduce to 39.8, sikit je.. so, i am restless and just lay down. Sumpah tak larat. Badan terkulai. Around 10.30 pm, Nurse came in for finding the lineto water drip. Ok. Left hand, attempt 2 times but failed. So, proceed to right hand ( around my wrist) success but a little bit suffer.

right hand.

that night. my sis surya teman me whole night. Kesian. dah la tak prepare nak stay. Super cold in the ward. Every 5 hour, nurse came in to check temperature, BP and many more. On the next morning, I still in the ward..rest. after taking breakfast and meds, they call up for X-ray for my lungs. At this time, i feel so relieve as Doc came by at the evening inform that i dont need water drip but need to take lot of water by myself. After x-ray, i taking my bath and sangat la lega! rimas with my own smell. HAHA. so, just restless in the ward. At this time, i cough a lot and flu a lot and the scary thing is my sputnm ( kahak) and my hingus is bleeding. I ask Doc, he inform it because of my virus infection in my blood. I was diagnose as viral diseases, which virus attacking my blood and infection also in my lungs. My white blood cells counts is greater that red blood cell. As i have allergic, G6PD i am specific in meds. Suspect, the blood count and infection is due from my meds that take before this is wrongly given by Doc and the main cause of virus is through my tonsil is swelling super big. U know what, that i unable to eat anything other than porridge because of my tonsil.

dinner day ke berapa tah. porridge saja ok.

breakfast : oatmeal and bread with milo

my last lunch : with little twins

last day dinner : porridge

setiap hari masuk ubat antiobiotik ( sangat high conc) and antidot ( tak sure apa, untuk prevent cloth). bila masuk je, aku rs mcm nk menjerit..sebab super sakit.. itu guna line cucuk sebelah kanan. agak suffering beberapa hari. masuk hati ke 3, aku dah tak boleh tahan. nurse cakap kene buat line baru, sebelah kiri. meremang. kalau ikut, da berapa kali cucuk dengan cari line tak jumpe, dengan amik darah beberapa kali. memang suffering. so, at last line baru sebelah kiri.

line at left hand. last antibiotic masuk. Nurse cakap line ni perfect sbb blood yang kluar show that it perfect. lega. so, total up is 9 cucuk for both hand. suffering.and masa hari ke 2 ke ke 3, i have to undergo CT Scan, menakutkan. selalu tgk dalam HOUSE je. ni bila kene sendiri scary. tak sakit cuma trauma tgk bende alah tu pusing2 atas kepala. scan ni for check either i have sinus or not and Doc inform ada sinus but not serious. lepas beberapa kali antibiotics, scan and x-ray what is the result? How my infection going on?

Next Entry.

the sick

2011-04-26T17:38:00.007+08:00

sakit itu penghapus dosa. ya, benar.

pecah rekod rasanya. harini cukup 2 minggu lebih aku off. off9 dari kerja. week yang pertama memang pegi training plus ada emergency need to go back to johore. then, comes the good news. i was officially permanent staff on that coming monday and i am soo happy that time. so, attend to HQ for briefing..Meanwhile at the evening, attend for training MLCN. ok. there goes the incident.

On Monday, 18th cuma rasa sakit perut yang melampau. Suspect masuk angin tak makan and been suffered since Sunday before. So, pegilah clinik panel dekat Annexe 2 and Doc gives ubat angin. Then, afterwards there goes the pain. Suddenly my body is total weak, my mind is out somewhere and my temperature is getting high. Eventho condition da agak teruk, but still bertahan sampai 5.30 pm. Call up my aunt to pick me up for clinic as I am so weak and restless. At clinic, just gives the same old meds and MC for the next day. After meal and takes my meds, i feel more suffered. My legs is numbs and i have serious headache which i cry every hours and minutes. I am unable to walk proper and body is total weak. Everytime i eat, i vomit it out. It happen that night and i barely cannot sleep. Every hour i woke up.
on Tuesday, as on MC. I rest at home. Morning feel the total pain. Im shivering like hell. Body and leg cramped. Eat in and everything is comes out and yes, I cry. I was soo like restless but still I hold myself until evening and my aunt say that my body is totally hot. At night, same things happen and i cannot sleep and i keep vomit like every hours and I am restless. Plus, headache makes me cry all day.
on Wednesday, I thot i will be okay but everything is wrong. I am restless, shivering and cry as my body temperature is getting high and my legs numb again. As no one at home, my aunt take advantages to come home after she settle up school canteen for student rest at 10.30 am, and arrived home around 11.30 am. She pick me up to Ustaz at Sri Gombak, but unfortunately it is closed and we both get back to Klinik Dr. Hj. Khadzali. ok, klinik ni is the best for me. He is good, understanding and nice. After a session with Dr, he suspect for dengue as my temperature is 39.8 and constant fever and so that i need to gives some blood for testing. Meanwhile, he give me other antibiotics and another 2 days of MC. At this time, my mommy and daddy is super worried so they came to KL from JB and arrived around 7.00 pm. As usual at night, im suffering to vomit, cannot sleep and body temperature is high. That night, mommy take a good care of me and also daddy keep watching me and worried about me.
on Thursday, as today on MC. I was feeling much better than before at 1st but suddenly my legs cramped and my temperature is kinda high which makes me restless. Letak kain atas kepala, 100 plus dah berapa botol but still not ok..A few hours then, I get sweating and feeling ok even went to AEON AU2 with daddy and mum for lunch and walk. OK. daddy and mum going back to Johor around 3.00 pm and saya sangat tak sedap hati sebab rasa badan still not OK but think it positively. At night, whatever i eat it cames out and legs cramped and not feeling very well.

my MCs.

my meds for 3 diff clinics, plus the only minyak Nonaroguy that i can use as i having blood allergic. G6PD. google okay!

on Friday, as advice from mummy I put my strength to work today and walk to Menara Maybank but still inside i feel the pain. At 1st, around 9.00 am, i am not feeling comfortable.. I already wearing 3 pcs and i wear up the jacket and pull the shawl around me as i am start to shivering bcz of coldness and my temperature is high. I cry. I called up the teams, and they adv me to go back home and went to check up again. I called up the Clinic, they inform its not dengue as my platlet count is normal and they req me to go back to see Dr. I ask favor from MBankers, but they all using train to work. So, RE Agro Bank is help me much. He pick me up and bring me to Clinic, and as Dr adv me to go Specialist. RE Agro is help me with faxing letter to PMCARE and waiting for them to fax back GL. So, he help me from A to Z. After settle up GL letter, he send me home. At home, i have no strength to do anything, i restless and end up with no lunch and i just lay down on bed shivering. I call up and text my aunt n cousin to go back early, as I needed to admit Specialist Hosp and they both shocked and I call daddy, sarah and Surya , they shocked.. when call up mummy, she cried.

What happen in the hospital?What actually happen to me?

Next Entry.

with the beautiful girls.

2011-04-15T11:32:00.013+08:00

it was unplanned. as before, every monday was a hectic and stressfull day ever among the other day in a week. but, fortunately this monday 11th april it was a loving day and awesome. as for me, after dating on weekends and early morning he send me direct to the office. then, goes weekdays so-called training, memang superrrr awesome. walk around times square, a little shopping.. shoes and shirts.. the girls catch up a skirts and a few clothes. hey, it was heaven ever. then, after shopping n etc there goes our lunch. yummy.... its kinda bit hard to decide as need to consider halal as i'm muslim, but fortunately both of them is okay. last-last hui yi decide johnny's! yes. yummy and the most important is we r FULL. Alhamdulilah..

johnny's times square.

here we come

after few decision and tadaa. aik.ada telo 2 biji. tulen ke tidak? haha

fish ape tah and meat balls. layan aje. sbb dah lapa.

with karen tan!

with hui yi..

busy cooking kan? kan? heheh

waiting... (perut pun dah bunyi..)

stil waiting....

after the meal.

with the beautiful girlssss...
image courtesy from Karen Tan album. tq karen. not yet upload from my phone.

notakaki: may God bless us. Amin.

good news

2011-04-14T11:19:00.003+08:00

alhamdulilah

just received good news, early this morning from hana.

terima kasih ya Allah. aku bersyukur kepada - Mu.

my other half

2011-04-12T15:39:00.023+08:00

l o v e

tolong jangan annoying dengan entri ni. biasa lah. tengah mood berchenta. tgh berkasih sayang ni. biarkan aje. kang buat entri emosi, menambah dosa pulak. kan? kan? ok. let me check.. my other half? not physically but ______ ( isikan tempat kosong sebab aku tatau nk define macam mana) hehe. last weekends, after not seeing for almost 3 months at last we both end up having a small vacation in Melaka. si dia yang ada reunion sekolah dia. sekolah arab. fuh fuh. sekali lagi. sekolah arab tanwiriah, Muar or Batu Pahat aku tak sure. tarik nafas sekali lagi. sekolah arab ya. tak ramai yang pegi dan yang pasti ex ke skandal masa skolah si dia yang jadi organizer. setakat mesra dgn ex or skandal lama tu, buat tak nampak aje lah. kalau layan hati panas. tak gitu? haha.

few snaps. let the picture talk.

ini ex-schoolmate dia.

intan.husna.lily a.k.a ex. fifah. fiqah. timah. HIM. solehudin. Zaki. saufi. Musa.

from left : lily ( ok. this is the girl..u know what i mean). husna. fifah. fiqah. timah and me (pls ignore, i'm just an outsider.)

tipikal gambar ber-dua sebab tak ada official photographer.

tenkiu a lots to Zudy for this pic. the only yg perfect for both of us.

banyak actually gambar.tapi, bukan reunion aku.so, ape cer nak sibuk-sibuk? haha. tak gitu?

notakaki : when on vacation, being spoiled by someone else. dem u.

life sucks

2011-04-12T10:01:00.003+08:00

life is unpredictable.

bak kata sorang mmber. life manusia yang tgh kemaruk lagi unpredictable. mcm haram.

entri ni pesan siap-siap.memang akan emosi.memang dalam hati ada carutan dari segala bahasa. actuallly tajuk entri tak ade kaitan pun dgn apa yg aku nak bebel.tgh geram dan hati panas.aku tak faham. ada org pernah ckp, kalau aku xde kat office tak ada effect pon. so,aku faham la yang aku ni hanyalah kambing hitam. ok.kambing hitam. tapi, sejak kebelakangan ini aku tak berapa nak faham. bila orang lain jadi leader, team mate termasuk aku akan membantu. tapi, bila aku jadi so-called leader, nak cakap team mate tak membantu..tak jugak.. nak ckp membantu tak jugak. pening aku. hangin sampai kepala pon ada.

aku rasa mcm dah handover keje aku.tapi, why must i get ALL THE BLAME? nak salahkan aku or salahkan sape-sape yang tak follow up. but, nevermind.. who else should be blame? no one perfect OKAY?? dah berapa kali aku luahkan ke sorang member tapi die keep on advice " sabar mai..sabar.. yang penting..kau dah handover then goes to the person who gets the job.." but, dalam hati dan dalam otak ni fikir and konon2 positive but at the end I GET ALL THE BLAME. tensen kan? rasa mcm nak mengamuk pon tak ada guna sebab yang pasti lepas ni yang BURUK nama aku gak. yang FACING customer aku gak. yang susah nk DEAL dgn sapa-sapa pun aku gak. so, mcm celaka la.

aku tak nak lebih-lebih dan yang pasti walaupun hati aku kuat yang aku sebenarnya tak bersalah dan tak ada hati nak BLAME orang lain pun tapi aku rela to accept all the past mistakes. beruntung kan dapat member macam aku. bersyukur la sikit woi! bukan nak masuk bakut, angkat sendiri. tapi, fikirlah. dalam operation center some ppl will acting selfish but only a few will get into the team. so, should i blame the fate that i'm just not lucky to get a team and around ppl like this? seriously CANNOT! the fact is i serioulsy dont give a damn anymore. now, officially i take all the blames. SATISFIED now?

notakaki: hidup dengan manusia yang dah perasan perfect susah gak. wutever la.die ingat die Tuhan kot. dem u!

sabar

2011-04-07T16:41:00.001+08:00

KARMA does exist.what goes around, comes around.

only GOD knows why.

notakaki: hati panas tapi redha dan sabar.

hell tuesday

2011-04-05T12:14:00.004+08:00

entri ni kalau boleh mencarut dengan perasaan bebas. memang penuh entri ni dengan kata-kata kesat. tapi, aku tidak begitu. ya, benar. cuma, hari ni the conclusion is like hell.
my tuesday is like hell. bukan salahkan takdir tapi ini ketentuan yang aku terima harini. everything seems not right.se-awal 5 pagi bangun, follow my aunt to school canteen. naik train tepat jam 6.00 pagi, memang waktu train start the operation. first time. sampai di KL sentral, kosong. terkiput-kiput cari news.com. hungry! grab a one or two bread n drinks. catch up bus to TTDI. so, arrive around 7.20 am. SO DAMN EARLY. i am soo exhausted. ok, next.
setiap pagi.run script.buat report. 9.58 am hantar.masuk conference call. nasib semua ada update.then, goes shoots from the bos. ok. masa tengah busy dgn report DSR. he shoot lots of things. yes yes. i am only ordinary human. i not able to do SO DAMN MANY things in one time. haish. plus, a few things went wrong disebabkan arahan si BOS and i am the one who to be blame because of his. i mean BOS lah! plus, one guy who req for help and i tried my best to catch a free time to help him but what the hell i get back is CURSE from him. yes, i am blur due to so many stuff need to be follow up. i admit but at least appreciate i already help you lah OKAYY. what a waste kan? sooo sad. plus, the partner seems not helping and i am the ONLY ONE who left as everyone else is busy breakfast and bla bla bla. at the end, NO LUNCH and only 1 slice of sandwich. HUNGRY okay! at the end, i cry. bukan nangis sebab rasa LOSER just rasa GERAM. aargh! wutever
then, goes training at the evening. bla bla bla. yes. i attend but not a fully focus as the training is super duper rare buat in daily life. yes, MBB bukan owner router. CSC managed. so, masuk telinga kanan keluar telinga kiri. bukan x take note, take note. cuma gitu-gitu je la. so, the result. the trainer email out that they dissappointed with evening session. so, what? senyum je la.
now, 7.29 pm. and still at the office. report pending since 1st April baru je selesai. sesi bercakap-cakap dgn bos selesai dan very lucky sebab our conversation is suam-suam kuku sebab muka aku da mcm belacan dgr dia bebel. pening.pening. kamon mai. just go with the flow. u need to ver survivor. tepat jam 8.00 pm, cukup hampir 12 jam aku kelaparan. Dayah dah menunggu muka macam anak kucing.
ok. cukup. dayah, jom makan!!!

tuesday, everything seems not right...but, who cares? I'm still survive. Alhamdulillah.

notakaki: nak tido.nak tido.

celaka

2011-04-04T15:04:00.004+08:00

mmg cilakoi.

celaka? kenapa.

bila balik rumah johor awal bulan lepas, ada je kejutan yang tak berapa nak happy. ayah eksaited. "adik, ada orang nak berkenalan...tu poskad.. duda tuu. HAHA" ha? terkejut aku.sumpah. dulu ada penah kes macam ni gak. masa tu sakan suka masuk contest dalam galaxie. tak tahu mana silap. address and details tiba-tiba ada dalam column yang page galaxie last sekali. ala, yang looking for friends and wutsoever. masa tu kes lagi celaka. lebih kurang satu kotak surat, poskad dan macam-macam surat dapat.cintan cintun. melayu ada. india ada. cina ada. bangsa lain pun ada. haha. desperate jugak manusia dalam dunia ni. memang selamat lah, no phone tak diexposed. kalau tak, memang menempuh bala bencana.

poskad ni. dari siape tah.divorced. cab driver.ampang pulak tu.sumpah scary nak naik taxi. mcm haram. aku dok pikir runsing, celah mana tau alamat rumah ni. setahu aku sejak kes dlu, memang tak masuk apa-apa contest dah. kalau issue pasal cab, lagi horror dulu. naik cab dgn sister. driver tu bawak route yang agak jauh and siap request nak no phone and seems like MEMAKSA. horror. driver tu, spectacles and chubby banyak. means, kalau dia duduk tu terkeluar la. nasibla mase tu, both of us sit at the back. my sis speechless and aku mcm biasa tergamam 2 minit pastu terus shoot ayat macam-macam. tak kasar tapi sinis. yang penting, terpaksa berjalan jauh sbb nak FAKE the real house we both stay. gila kau, kalau dia tau rumah. nak mampos?

notakaki: dunia tidak lagi selamat? r u sure?

that girl is soo dangerous

2011-04-03T00:33:00.012+08:00

yes.this girl is dangerous. hehe.

little wawa at istana budaya, still on Lat Kampung boy The Musical Fever.

she is not dangerous, but she is ADORABLE.

luve u.

notakaki: i miss my baby means HARRY.

shokuro sedap

2011-04-03T00:33:00.008+08:00

ekceli. tak ada niat nk tiru sapa-sapa. but co-incidently just got info that my cousin also doing and making chocs. as for now, she's not into biz due to super busy working but insya-Allah will do in future. here some few snaps after a night at her house in bangi. not sure the exact name, praline. chocs compound. oreo and etc but of course chocs are delicious!so, then, we called it as delicious-shokura. anyone interest can buzz tru Fb or twitter. shall do by customer request and then the price. insyaAllah will give the cheapest. :)

as masa tgh bakes some chocs, the kiddos Irfan, little twins jaja and wawa are tukang menjilat chocs dalam bekas. :) oh, senang je buat chocs ni.. just need a few tips, recipe and then must be RAJIN okay!

notakaki: testing.testing. masak kuah kari asam laksa tak lepas. ni nak buat chocolate. haih.

bean boy

2011-04-01T10:47:00.004+08:00

1st April

Happy Birthday

bean boy

gay boy

jambu boy

love u

makin hari makin tengok. jambu betol BF ni. ever since he busy with his photography stuff which is he LOVE so much even more than me, i was been left out and ignore quite a long time. so sad kan?. but, no matter what happen. hope that the heart remain the same. insyaAllah.

notakaki: happy birthday shuze and adhel. love u.

Lat Kampung Boy

2011-03-31T14:10:00.020+08:00

Lat Kampung Boy Sebuah Muzikal

Istana Budaya

with BFF : Arlyne.Yantea.K.Leen and Wa.

Lat Book

Clockwise.

Lat (small) Daniel. Jalil Hamid ( Lat's Father). Awie ( Lat). Puspa ( Mrs. Thambi). Douglas Lim( Frankie, Lat's Bestfriend) and Sandra as Mrs. Hew. (Lat's English Teacher)

Jom!

Sampai 5 April je!

Komen: Best gile! and mmg luck as Dato' Lat also there in the picture!! U guys should watch this muzikal, everything is in ' loghat perak ' hehe. awesome!

haiya!

2011-03-28T16:06:00.002+08:00

lagi 3 hari nak habis March. rindu nak update blog.sebelum ni, sign in je, tapi bila for new post. tergamam tak tau nak tulis ape. hari-hari ada aktiviti. macam-macam. nak cerita satu-satu perlu masa khas. bila on9 kt rumah, askar little jaja and wawa confirm akan kacau sambil mengomen. last-last on9 kejap for FB pastu off.

harini 28 march. alhamdulilah, suara dah ada setelah seminggu sengsara. ok.cukup. sumpah nak cerita. tapi, nanti lah. insya'Allah ada masa luang will update more detail soon. rindu la kat awak mim-alif-ya! muah muah.!

notakaki: tak sabar nak cerita pasal LAT Kampung Boy Sebuah Muzikal. Tunggu..

bila baby berhijab.

2011-03-20T00:45:00.007+08:00

ekceli mengemas tudung yang sepah di rak. sambil mengemas, ada orang join the club. to make everything clear and tidy back, kene ada upah. as request, " mi, akai...." means, mami..nak pakai.. ok. pakai hijab, tapi skirt. takpe. tak baligh lagi. ouh, both u super duper cute tapi super duper nakal. penat makcik dia ni. sekejap-sekejap bising, pastu melalak. macam-macam. cepat besar nanti boleh ikot mami jalan-jalan balik johor naik bas and pegi shopping. BEST!

2 pic above is Najwa

all 3 above is Najihah.

notakaki: cute. can i have a baby like now? :P

Giveaway - Saya Nak Rasa Coklat Sweet Cottage

2011-03-20T00:30:00.003+08:00

jom makan coklat sedap.

coklat sedap. jangan salah anggap.coklat juga baik untuk kesihatan. tapi makan tu biar berpada.ok?
coklat sedap! jom join contest, free chocs!

Sweet cottage! Homemade Chocs!

TAG:
ManAbsyaMira

notakaki: kan senang? :) kalau menang dapat free chocs. nyum nyum.

CONTEST - Jangan Pandang camera

2011-03-15T15:55:00.004+08:00

tokei agrobank ni kalao nak tag aku senyap-senyap.nasib aku blogwalking.cis.cis.ini semua pasal contest ni. muke aku dah la suke tgk camera sipi-sipi je. konon-konon cute lah. haha.

PENGANJUR: Wajah Rahsia Hati

TAJUK CONTEST: JANGAN pandang camera!!!

TARIKH TUTUP: 15 March 2011 - esok!

hah,ni je gambar yang tak pandang camera.

tag:

zul

tikah kecheq

mira

:)just to kill the time(:

end up marrying someone husband

2011-03-15T15:40:00.002+08:00

angkat tangan siapa nak kawin dgn someone husband?
angkat.

cepat.

oh, ada.

siapa tu?

....... (identiti dirahsiakan...)

merepek. siapa nak kawin dgn laki orang and automatically menjadi 2nd wife. tak boleh nak marah.kalau dah jodoh.jodoh jugak. kan? kan? saje je post entry title ni. save draft since 15 March, hari ni 31 March baru nak tulis. dem. someone husband? pesanan penting, jangan salahkan si suami kalau dia mencari lain. jangan juga salahkan orang ketiga. jangan juga salahkan sesiapa. itu semua hukum alam. kan lelaki boleh kawin 4. ( ok, obvious sangat aku sangat menyokong lelaki kawin 4 dan dimadukan. kan? kan? ) aku cakap je.sokong tak sokong, belakang cerita. as long its not happen on me. okay. enough. actually, the wife itself kene fikir. cukupkah layan anda kepada suami anda? bukan dari segi batin. dari segi lain. lemah-lembut. tak marah-marah. tak kutuk-kutuk kalau dia beli barang. tak maki. tak merendahkan lelaki. hati lelaki ini ego. kene bersyukur kalau dia belikan barang untuk keluarga. dia ikhlas. ok. i speak based on experienced. kah kah. melampau. tak lah. just based on books la. layan tu jangan lebih kurang. kalau ada anak pon, lelaki or suami kene layan gak. hati suami kene jaga. keluarga atau suami, suami dulukan. so, kalau da kawin and dah pergi kursus kawin kan? tak kan tak faham? haiyaaa... jangan nak emo-emo pulak. haha. aku da buntu nak cakap apa sbb aku tak kawin lagi. kah kah.

notakaki: jadi mood kawin ni slow dah.walaupun tgk sekeliling suma sakan kawin tahun ni. cis.

forget you

2011-03-15T14:22:00.004+08:00

dedicate khas for you know who you are.

cee lo - f u
I see you driving 'round town With the girl you love and I'm like, Forget you! Oo, oo, ooo I guess the change in my pocket Wasn't enough I'm like, Forget you! And forget her too!
I said, if I was richer, I'd still be with ya Ha, now ain't that some sh*t? (Ain't that some sh*t?) And although there's pain in my chest I still wish you the best with a... Forget you!
Oo, oo, ooo
Yeah I'm sorry, i can't afford a Ferrari, But that don't mean i can't get you there. I guess she's an Xbox and I'm more Atari, But the way you play your game ain't fair. I pity the fool that falls in love with you (oh sh*t she's a gold digger) Well (just thought you should know n*gga) Ooooooh I've got some news for you Yeah go run and tell your little girlfriend
I see you driving 'round town With the girl I love and I'm like, Forget you! Oo, oo, ooo I guess the change in my pocket Wasn't enough I'm like, Forget you! And forget her too! I said, if I was richer, I'd still be with ya Ha, now ain't that some sh*t? (Ain't that some sh*t?) And although there's pain in my chest I still wish you the best with a... Forget you! Oo, oo, ooo
Now I know, that I had to borrow, Beg and steal and lie and cheat. Trying to keep ya, trying to please ya. 'Cause being in love with you ass ain't cheap. I pity the fool that falls in love with you (oh sh*t she's a gold digger)
Now baby, baby, baby, why d'you wanna wanna hurt me so bad?(so bad, so bad, so bad) I tried to tell my mamma but she told me "this is one for your dad" (your dad, your dad, your dad) Uh! Whhhy? Uh! Whhhy? Uh! Whhhy lady? Oh! I love you oh! I still love you. Oooh!
I see you driving 'round town With the girl I love and I'm like, Forget you! Oo, oo, ooo

notakaki: lupakan saja.mari cari yang baru. ayuh!

meds for heart

2011-03-10T20:23:00.003+08:00

ubat apa yang paling susah diubati tapi murah untuk dicari. tak perlu wang ringgit.

kadang-kadang tak semua bende dalam dunia ini boleh diubati.

bila sudah ditentukan yang kita ni sakit dan tidak ada ubat, cuma menunggu masa panggilan sakaratul maut je. takut kan.saat tu baru tergopoh-gapah dengan bekalan amalan kita masa sihat. banyak yang baik ke banyak yang mendajalkan manusia. cuba fikir balik...bla bla bla....aku dah masuk siri ceramah agama.. cukup. aku rasa tak layak nk cerita tentang agama, cukup sekadar bekala sendiri.insya'Allah..

bila dikatakan ubat.ubat paling susah ialah ubat ialah ubat untuk hati. tapi, sebenarnya ubat hati yang paling senang. tak yah beli mahal-mahal. ubat hati. hanya perlu menjadi seorang yang optimis dan berfikiran positif. ubat hati ialah bekalan di masa hadapan yang cerah.serius. bila cerita tentang hati. kalau nk banding dgn dulu, rasa dulu lagi syaitan. sekarang dah kurang sikit. ubat hati pemarah, dendam dan segala-mala amarah dah hampir berjaya dipupuskan. meds for heart?

tak payah susah-susah, kalau kita ni seorang umat Islam. pergi rajin-rajin menghadap Tuhan dgn solat dan baca Al-Quran. kalau kau Kristian, pergilah church dan buatlah confession. setiap apa pun agama yang kita anuti, ada cara nak atasi semua masalah hati dgn cara yang elok. tak payah susah-susah. pernah ke tgk agama apa yang perlu bunuh diri untuk ubat masalah hati ni? ada? ada? tu bangang namanya.

notakaki: sedang usaha to be optimist and positive seMAXIMUM mungkin. u can do it!

Its okay

2011-03-10T10:40:00.000+08:00

kadang-kadang tak terluah perasaan kecewa, sedih, tragis, geram atau segala mala jenis perasaan.macam sekarang, aku tak pasti perasaan apa, tapi yang pasti kecewa dan sedih. dengan keadaan kesihatan yang tak berapa ok(hal perempuan la. ) makin menjadi-jadi. jadi sakit hati bila ada orang tak memahami perasaan kita. minggu ni memang serabut. satu kes bermain dgn cinta. itu punca keserabutan.cinta jarak-jauh yang tak ada kepercayaan dan ketulusan. geram weyh.geram. lepas tu, penambahan orang tumpang rumah, sampai kesian dia tak terlayan sbb kita terlalu serabut dan banyak kerja. sampai kat rumah pon bos chase. serabut otak. dan tak pasal-pasal, bos assign new job. lagi serabut. kehulur-kehilir dari office ke 2nd office dengan beg yang berat dan gaya macam berkereta la kan... padahal hanya berpublic transport.taxi beb.taxi. orang kaya ada driver. kau ada? haha. dem u kaya la kan? cis! taxi mahal weyh. bukan ikot distance, ikut masa ok! ok.tambah lagi keserabutan, kawan baik yang tiba-tiba membenci tak tentu pasal. tak faham kenapa. mungkin kita tak layan dia sbb kita sibuk. eh, xkan tak memahami langsung? sumpah. serabut kepala.

semua sebab serabut kepala dan bila jumpa orang lain. saya senyum. saya okay la bila ramai tanya "are u ok mai?". inside there always a pain everytime i pretend to smile and say "i'm Okay".masuk hari ni, dah 5 hari xde selera makan. bukan nak diet, tapi sebab masalah yang menimpa-nimpa, jadi serabut kepala. jadi kecewa. jadi sedih. dengan family yang jauh dan tak berapa nak memahami, lagi menambah keserabutan. pada siape nak luah? hanya Tuhan yang sentiasa mendengar. :(

There is always A little pain behind every Its okay.

notakaki: cry out loud inside here.

kalau bukan awak, siapa lagi?

2011-03-09T09:30:00.000+08:00

If Not For You

If not for you, I wouldn’t know
What true love really meant.
I’d never feel this inner peace;
I couldn’t be content.

If not for you, I’d never have
The pleasures of romance.
I’d miss the bliss, the craziness,
Of love’s sweet, silly dance.

I have to feel your tender touch;
I have to hear your voice;
No other one could take your place;
You’re it; I have no choice.

If not for you, I’d be a drift;
I don’t know what I’d do;
I’d be searching for my other half,
Incomplete, if not for you.

credit to : love poems

notakaki: saya bagi awak peluang lagi. who else if not u.

kecewa

2011-03-07T14:48:00.002+08:00

harini saya kecewa.

hargailah cinta bila kita ada cinta dan hargailah orang yang mencintai kita. (itu cakap kat aku ke kat orang tu??. ah, mana-manalah!!)

yang penting harini saya kecewa. kekecewaan saya bukan mcm sebelum ni. kali ni betul-betul kecewa. rasa macam nak get this OVER but......... rasa mcm kejam.. am i mean? saya dah bagi chance kat dia banyak kali, for almost 4 years. too many chances but i'm not sure he aware of it or not. wutever la.

saya nak cari yang lain? cinta tu datang dan pergi. saya malas. saya redha. kalau ibu nak jodohkan saya, saya rela. OMG! no!

notakaki: saya masih cinta yang satu itu.

kalau jodoh tak kemana

2011-02-26T22:28:00.004+08:00

kalau jodoh tak ke mana.

kalau jodoh tak kemana. ok? ok. kalau xde duet, memang tak kemana. tapi, itu mustahil la. baru 3 hari dpt gaji, xkan tak kemana. tapi, thats fact. 1st time saturday and sunday aku duduk rumah. x kemana. sampai suratkhabar dua hari ni pon tak beli. bosan.

ok.cukup. sejak menjak ni, hidup penuh dgn tanda tanya. apakah yang terjadi dgn masa depan? kalau lagi spesifik lagi, masa depan is MARRIAGE. okay. kalau tgk fb status, bertubi-tubi PM and chat dgn kita pasal " eh, betul ke kau nk kawin?" " eh, kau ade prob ke nk kawin" dan soalan yang sewaktu dengannya. YES, i want to get marry but only got ONE problem. its MOMMY. yes. ibu.

like ones said, kalau bab kahwin ni yang penting orang tua nya dulu. yes, for my part family is okay. but, MOM. im not sure what is on her mind. i know she want the best for her daughter, but saya ni bukan anak raja. saya bukan reti masak sangat pon. walaupun saya ber'degree dan saya kerja agak OKAY. tapi, saya tak nak demand macam-macam. saya bukan lawa macam ayu raudhah atau maizurah hamzah. jauh sama-sekali. banyak halangan betul nak ke another stages. kewangan? alhamdulilah but still mommy tak convience. perlukah gaji aku 5 ribu atau 10 ribu. aku pun sudah rasa cukup dan bersyukur dengan gaji. setakat tak ada komitmen ni boleh la aku hidup. cuma nak berenjoy sana-sini tu takat dalam mimpi je la. tapi, like ones said. bila dah kahwin, rezeki melimpah-luah. kan? kan? boleh tak harap yang tu? insyaAllah.

kalau jodoh tak kemana, sebanyak mana halangan dan dugaan yang ditempuhi akan tetap bersama. ( sumpah geli.. ayat ni. HAHA) ok. but thats the FACT. kalau itu jodoh kita, pusing ke mana pon kita tetap nampak dia. kan? maybe a few obstacles utk aku ke another stages ni agak menduga hati dan iman. tapi, aku gagahkan hati walaupun 2 hari dah bergenang air mata sebab fikir apa yang tak kena lagi. ishk. mungkin hidup atau family aku tak semudah atau sporting like others family but they still my blooody family. okay. no matter what happen they still in my blood. hurm. mungkin apa yang berlaku cuma dugaan dalam kehidupan utk bekeluarga. ( ewah, belum lagi okay? jgn perasan! )

okay.sila terima hakikat jodoh dan pertemuan terletak pada Tuhan. InsyaÁllah hanya Dia yang tahu apa yang terbaik utk hambaNya. Amin.

notakaki: tgh excited ni.sila faham.love KAMJ.

ni bukan valentines, tapi saja nak cakap pasal CINTA. geli!

2011-02-23T11:18:00.006+08:00

i cannot live without love. kau boleh?

jangan salah tafsir. love. cinta. kasih sayang. its not exactly love from a guy. but, cinta tu terlalu subjektif. love, cinta. serius. i cannot live without love. saya perlukan cinta. cinta agung dengan ALLAH s.w.t. itu terlalu penting, WAJIB dalam hidup aku. kalau tak ada, manakan aku nk menghadap sejadah sujud kepada-Nya. kan? cinta kepada segala pegangan AGAMA ISLAM itu WAJIB. takperlu ulang beberapa kali, sbb aku tau. okay. sekarang berbalik dgn kisah cinta.CINTA?

cinta kepada KELUARGA itu penting. walaupun sejak kebelakangan ini, aku macam disisih. tapi, aku faham. aku yang senyapkan diri. tak call. x msg. tak roger langsung apa buat hari-hari. bukan malas. tapi, phone kene blocked. ceh. alasan. bukan tak nak call, msg ke hape. aku sendiri yang malas. semuanya malas. entah bila nk rajin. HAHA. ok, biarkan. CINTA kepada KELUARGA tetap kukuh. macam ayat k.June, what ever the issues and crisis , they still our FAMILY. okay. lagi-lagi IBU. sbb k.june is IBU! kalau cakap lebih-lebih ingat aku anak derhaka, jenis melawan mak ayah.opss, silap. mak sahaja. melawan ayah? NEVER. sbb ayah super SPORTING. that y i LOVE DADDY. mak? bukan melawan. kita tau MAK mahu yang terbaik utk anak dia, lagi-lagi anak dia ni PEREMPUAN okay. kita faham tapi kita ni je yang tak ikut cakap MAK. Degil kan anak mak ni? tapi, kita SAYANG MAK tau! kakak kesayangan kita, SARAH dan SURYA. also ABG IPAR ku, FENDI. memang kita sayang SUME tapi kita ni je jenis bukan nak tunjuk kita SAYANG. kan? EGO betul.

cinta dgn KEHIDUPAN. aneh x? kehidupan sekarang. kita mmg CINTA. sbb kalau kita tak cintakan kehidupan kita camane kita nak teruskan kehidupkan kita kan? tak kisahla, sama ada hidup kita ni tunggang-langgang, hidup kita ni susah atau senang, hidup kita ni biase-biase je. yang pasti kita CINTA. kesimpulan cinta dgn kehidupan tanda kita bersyukur dgn apa yang Tuhan bagi. syukur dgn hidup ini. Nasib kita hidup lagi dan mampu merasa setiap apa yang ada dalam hidup, kalau kita mati. boleh ke? SYUKUR la woi.

cinta dgn KERJA.subjek ni memang menusuk hati. especially utk aku la. pasal kerja. aku rasa sejak bekerja, aku la yang paling banyak merungut. ish. menyesal. cinta dgn KERJA. itu perlu. kalau tak, mana datang PASSION? kerja semberono aje. bosan kan? walaupun kerja aku ni seperti menjadi bahan gelak orang sekeliling, tapi aku tetap CINTA. cinta paksa. KERJA ni perlu cinta, kalau tak sapa nk sara aku bulan-bulan. aku bukan ada SUGAR DADDY pon oi. work for life babeyh!

cinta dgn MANUSIA. ini memang subjektif. manusia ni aku spesifik more to others than family la. which like friends, relatives, colleague and BOYFRIEND. ok, mula-mula.

Friends: kawan-kawan dari Tadika JKR Kota TInggi, Sek Ren Laksamana, Sek Men Laksamana ( 2 minggu ) dan STF, semua aku cinta. STF >> Kipas Susah Mati memang cinta lah. (geli x?) ok.aku sayang semua. lepas tu kawan masa Matriks N9, UniMAP. sumpah cinta dalam hati. kalau aku tak cinta kawan-kawan, camane aku nk berjaya. mintak soklan, mintak ajarkan subjek lembap, dalam exam hall tiru sama-sama, menari sama-sama, study sama-sama, lari skolah sama-sama, pecah bilik tayangan sama-sama lantas digantung bersama. semua tu sebab cintakan kawan-kawan la. cuba kalau hidup sorang-sorang, bosan okay! bored to death!

Relatives: surely aku cinta dan sayang. cuma sayang camtu je la. sayang saudara-mara.

Colleague: mestilah sayang dan tangkap cintan cintun siap. kalau tak cintan, manakan nak bekerjasama menggoreng issue dan cases. kalau goreng sorang-sorang tak sedap, kene goreng bersama. barulah customer YAKIN. yezza!

Boyfriend: selama hidup 25 tahun, cinta dgn LELAKI selain ayahanda terchenta cuma hanya ada 2 sahaja.

1 - cinta monyet zaman sekolah rendah. oh, this guy is sooo handsome and very HOT masa skolah rendah ( aku tak faham celah mana HOT masa sekolah rendah.hingusan habis..) but, sumpah. this guy kita cinta dgn die since darjah 4 sampai 6.korang google DEVOTEES, cari yang paling kurus pakai spec dan handsome. ha, itu la cinta monyet ku.

2. cinta harapan kekal abadi. BFF. HARRY. ini sudah hampir 4 tahun cinta jarak jauh. harap-harap berkekalan hingga ke akhir hayat. AMIN.

kenapa aku tiba-tiba cerita cinta ni. entah. saja. eh, tipu. sebenarnya aku HOMESICK. nak balik rumah, tapi x kesampaian lagi. plus aku LOVESICK to harry. bila la nk jumpa dia. entah kita ni ada jodoh ke takda. serah pada Tuhan je la sayang. kita usaha dan DOA. Amin.

notakaki: let get some love.

almost lost

2011-02-22T09:21:00.006+08:00

saya bukan hilang pedoman atau hilang akal, cuma hilang arah tujuan hidup.masih lagi kekal dan cekal dengan kerja.kali ni pasal kerja surely no problem, sbb tu je la sumber kehidupan aku di bandar metropolitan ni.penuh dgn penipuan dan materialistik.hidup aku tak semudah orang lain, dan pasti aku rasa ada orang lain yang facing worst dari life aku. but, still im just based on what i earn from my career.rasa-rasa cukup x? hurrm..kalau bukan dr kerja, dr mana? semua sebab future life...... blank and lost!

lost my mind.

hari ni betul-betul aku buntu. kejadian dua hari lepas seakan bagi aku pengajaran supaya lebih berhati-hati. sebelum ni, da je berhati-hati.. tapi,kalau dah kene nak buat camne..ishk. aku serabut kepala. banyak bende yang aku fikir dan masalah yang bertimbun-timbun. pasal masa depan aku, aku tak pasti. dari segi kahwin ke apa jadah semua tu aku tak pasti. aku lost bila semalam conversation aku dgn ibu dan abang angkat aku buat aku jadi buntu. pasal masa depan kerja, kewangan aku okay cuma ibu masih tak puas hati dgn itu semua. so, aku nk buat ape? cuba fikir. kira rezeki sebab aku kerja, cuba kalau aku tak kerja..lagi mengamok x? kerja sekarang okay, cukup utk sara aku di KL. cuma status kerja aku masih tergantung, CONTRACT okaaay! tapi, aku masih bersabar lagi. kalau akhir tahun ni masih CONTRACT, memang aku berhenti. sanggup jadi tutor or buat pusat tusyen. or whatever la...asalkan bukan bende haram. howkay.

arini betul menduga iman.nasib pasal kerja aku maintain.kerja tetap kerja. tapi, aku agak distract siket.eh, bukan siket. superrrr distract okay! biarlah. serious. aku rasa frust. depressed. dan totall regret!! regret dgn apa? everything! rasa mcm nk turn back the time, but definitely CANNOT okay! so, whatever it is kene face la for life and death.

aku bukan bebel atau merungut.aku cuma meluahkan perasaan sbb i think i almost lost my mind thinking of what is happening to me. T_T

notakaki: image credit to pakcik google.

sayang balik la.

2011-02-21T10:57:00.002+08:00

2 jam yang lepas dapat msg

"I off fon 2 hari"

sentap kejap. pastu bila try call dah masuk voicemail. laju gila off phone! aargh!!! howkay!. we both having a small argument last weekends and yes its my fault and fine. (EGO) da cakap sorry and lots of things aku da buat nak pujuk dia. aku rasa lah kut......currently he at perlis ada training..at first the training cancel. so, i amm soo relieved la. yes, jauh okay. perlis. tak suka. then, lepas kejadian ni. suddenly, "ahad mlm sy pegi perlis" eh, jadi pulak. ok. die memang kene pegi training or die pegi volunteer nak pegi training tu sbb bawak diri or whatever sy tak tatau. tapi, saya rs die merajuk dan time-time mcm ni lah dia jauh buat saya tak suka dan di selubungi rasa bersalah yang teramat sangat. im totallll guilty!!!! tensennye. plus, phone off for 2 days lagi makes me sick! homaigod. apa yang berlaku last weekends tu? erm, biar je la. tak ada apa yang teruk sangat tapi please notice kalau anak dara berjalan tengah-tengah malam sampai pagi okaayy.. mesti emo kan? kan?

malam semalam kene ceramah. dia tau saya tak suka kene ceramah. tapi, sebenarnya apa yang dia cakap itu betul. mungkin selama ni aku underestimate young guys. ok, sila faham aku bercinta dgn budak muda okayy. so, kdg2 apa yang dia cakap aku mls nk ifkir and ignore is better. but kali ni, sentap and sudah mula rasa macam guilty plus ada sedikit keinsafan. bila dia cakap, sy melawan. die cakap lagi, sy menjawab. kalau depan mata, rasanya die akan blah kalau tak kene penampar satu dua. erm, mungkin tidak. dia tak pernah berkasar dgn aku. hurm..

cerita dengan kawan.die cakap kenapa runsing sangat gaduh dgn BF. yes, i am lost kalao tgh x seronok dgn BF sbb we both sangat jarang gaduh sbb die tak suka marah saya. kenapa? sbb dia sayang saya la oi! (plis jgn geli) ini mmg hakikat, die tak suka gaduh dan kdg2 saya yang cri pasal nk gaduh. HAHA. seronok juga, tapi die bab memujuk FAILED. saya tau dia sayang cuma nak tunjuk, JAUH. nk cakap jiwang-jiwang, NOT OUR TYPE. nak anta hadiah or apa-apa, TAK RAJIN. nk msg or call, FRIENDS is MORE important (utk dia la.) entahla. we both is macam langit dan bumi, die very pemaaf dan myself super emotional. but, die dont care. we've been together almost 4 years ( long distance relationship okay) sangat bertahan walaupun banyak kejadian CURANG yang berlaku sepanjang 4 tahun tu. HAHA. hurm, suddenly i miss all the moments dgn dia. dalam kereta, bila minah ni tgh bebel, EMO tapi dia rilek je. die tak pernah BORING dgn sy. oh, rindu pula.

bila dah macam ni, mula rasa rindu membuak-buak. terngiang-ngiang bruno mars menyanyi lagu long distance, lagi-lagi part long distance is killing me. seriously.

sayang, balik la.. maafkan sy. u know that i seriously love u soo much.

tak suka

2011-02-17T16:54:00.004+08:00

saya tak suka bila saya rasa dipergunakan dan segala cerita yang sepatutnya menjadi RAHSIA di sebarkan merata-rata.

tak suka.

birthday!

2011-02-17T16:22:00.006+08:00

ecah the pink. sayda the grey.

mira the green

*****

ecah and syaf:

happy belated bday.

sayda dan mira:

happy birthday.

tenkiu for being the craziest friends ever :)

hari ni aku kene tinggal

2011-02-14T16:17:00.000+08:00

valentines? shit!

cerita hari khamis

2011-02-10T15:56:00.004+08:00

hari ini khamis.

banyak item arini

which sepatutnya aku puasa, tapi sebab kes mlm tad. terus cancel. balik awal. tapi, super sakit kepala. dengan cuaca tak menentu mmg buat aku sakit kepala. jam 9 aku da tido nyenyak sampai la jam 4.00 pagi. ( over tido weyh!! ) jam 4.00 pagi aku dikejutkan dengan call kawan cantik, tanya pasal jam. mengapa orang lain membuat fitnah namanya? aku pulak yang tensen. kalau buat salah sila mengaku, jgn libatkan orang lain. aku tak kisah kalau kau terus-terang pa yang terjadi dgn barang aku, i'm okay. but, u just screw everything but blame orang lain. haish. kau ni. penatlah mcm ni. pasal jam ni je jadi issue.

pagi ke kerja arini aku lmbat. train yang spoiled. tggu dari jam 7.50, 8.45 aku baru dapat naik train. dah la super ramai orang. berebut-rebut. pening aku.. nasib berebut pagi-pagi, cuba kalau berebut ptg hari. fuhhhh.. bau yang awesome! ok, cukup. aku mula imagine bangla, indo2 naik train lepas seharian bekerja. fuh. masak! ok. sampai kerja jam 9.15 am kut. itu baru nk stabil. letak je bontot atas kosi, mula pemangsa mencari mangsa. kene kejar dgn customer. HAHA. aku nk gelak. actually dah 2 hari aku xde kat sini, aku sakan pegi TTDI dengan mcm-mcm aktiviti. tad masa lunch informer bgtau, customer cukup emo smlm aku xde. siap cover2 depan dia, sbb informer tu baik dgn aku. lek la weyh. baru 2 hari aku xde. bukan ada issue sgt pon. so, chill la. tapi, salah aku jugak. tak email. mati aku kalau diorang barua dgn boss aku. mampos.

bila kerja.aku mcm biasa.layan kerja. aku check email segala mala. ade bende tak puas hati aku reply. CC : Boss. HAHA. kejam x? bukan apa. selama setahun aku ditindas, kali ni aku da determine nk fight for the right! chayok mai!

jam dah 4.43 pm. lagi 8 minit aku nak pegi solat asar. solat siap-siap.kang aku terkejar-kejar naik bas, tak sempat nk asar. ok. kerja lagi siket nk settle. nice. babai.

notakaki: minggu ni last TIRAMISU layan yok!

Poetry: A Way of Seeing

2011-02-10T11:22:00.003+08:00

by myself

When i'm by myselfand i close my eyesI'm a twinI'm a dimple in a chinIm'a room full of toys I'm a squeaky noiseI'm a gospel songI'm a gongI'm a leaf turning redI'ma whatever I want to beAn anything I care to beAnd when I open my eyesWhat i care to be

is me

by Eloise Greenfield

notakaki: love.

saya mahu jadi diri sendiri

2011-02-09T10:49:00.006+08:00

tiba-tiba bila dalam train semalam terngiang-ngiang lagu davin degraw. especially, lagu I dont wanna to be. bila tgk balik lirik memang menusuk hati. bila kita rasa kita berada dgn orang lain, kita akan jadi orang lain ( eh, kau paham x?) sebenarnya, dalam erti kata lain..hipokrit. lagi-lagi aku tgk cerita 8TV - Paris Hilton - Searching for BFF. super tak boleh blah! final battle between Stephanie and Teniscia. sapa yang menang tak penting, tapi yang penting siapa yang betul-betul be themselves and sape yang super hipokrit sbb nak menang contest tu. memang meluat tgk perangai masing-masing. seriously. tgk balik lirik lagu, tak yah cakap or explain panjang -panjang. tak ada guna untuk menjadi orang lain, bila kita dah selesa menjadi diri sendiri. betul x? orang lain nak terima tak nak terima terpulang. bila menjadi diri sendiri dan tidak menyusahkan orang lain ok la, it good. tapi, kalau sebabkan menjadi diri sendiri dan menyusahkan orang sekeliling..kita kena fikir balik dan terpulang kepada tuan punya badan. itu hak masing-masing.

utk aku : i love being myself.

I don't need to be anything other than a prison guard's son,

I don't need to be anything other than a specialist's son,

I don't have to be anyone other than the birth of two souls in one,

Part of where I'm going is knowing where I'm coming from,

I don't wanna be anything other than what I've been tryin' to be lately,

All I have to do is think of me and have peace of mind,

I'm tired of looking 'round rooms wonder what I gotta do,

Or who I'm supposed to be,

I don't wanna be anything other than me,

I'm surrounded by liars everywhere I turn,

I'm surrounded by impostors everywhere I turn,

I'm surrounded by identity crisis everywhere I turn,

Am I the only one to notice?

I can't be the only one who's learned,

I don't wanna be anything other than what I've been tryin' to be lately,

All I have to do is think of me and have peace of mind,I

'm tired of looking 'round rooms wonder what I gotta do,

Or who I'm supposed to be,

I don't wanna be anything other than me,

Can I have everyone's attention please?

If you're not like this and that, you're gonna have to leave,

I came from the mountains,

The crust of creation,

My whole situation made from clay to stone,

And now I'm telling everybody,

I don't wanna be anything other than what I've been tryin' to be lately,

All I have to do is think of me and have peace of mind,

I'm tired of looking 'round rooms wonder what I gotta do,

Or who I'm supposed to be,

I don't wanna be anything other than me.

nota kaki: meaningful every single words.

faces

2011-02-07T21:59:00.014+08:00

Izzani Nur Najwa: at Mines Bowling.

Izzani Nur Najiha: at Mines Bowling

Dr.Mira: Azeela's birthday

Akil: at Muar.

Harith and Harry : Penang

Harith

Akil Niece: Muar

Bapak Budak : Kedah

Budak cantik: Muar
notakaki: confident diri cantik. Bagus!

u make me smile

2011-02-07T14:15:00.003+08:00

february?

someone?

its february and its all about him.

we've been talk so much lately. i can't stop thinking of you. seriously. tapi, dia advice to do something and create a hobby to make my time. bukan utk forget him forever but just to kill the time. we've been staying far away for almost 3 years. ishk. sumpah no words can describe how jealous i am seeing others lovers having fun together all time. inside i'm hurt. i really miss u. i badly want to do excited things with u. lunch, dinner date. back from work, seeing you makes all my stress of working just fade away. when i'm sick, its u the one who taking me to clinic and take care of me. i want you to be the one. baby, no words can describe how much i really need you. need you by myside. always! having weekends and nights to spent together. lepaking, movies and gossiping.oh, i want that momento!!!

Dedicate this song : really means every single words:

Long Distance: Bruno Mars

There's only so many songsThat I can sing to pass the timeAnd I'm running out of things to doTo get you off my mind

All i have is this picture in a frameThat I hold close to see your face every dayWith you is where I'd rather beBut we're stuck where we areAnd it's so hard,you're so farThis long distance is killing me

I wish that you were here with meBut we're stuck where we areAnd it's so hard,you're so farThis long distance is killing me

It's so hard,it's so hard Where we are,where we areYou're so far,this long distance is killing meIt's so hard,it's so hard Where we are,where we areYou're so far,this long distance is killing me

Now the minutes feel like hoursAnd the hours feel like daysWhile I'm awayYou know right now I can't be homeBut I'm coming home soon,coming home soon

There's only so many songsThat I can sing to pass the tïme..All i have is this picture in a frame

notakaki: i heart u.

♥ KAMJ

2011-01-31T17:25:00.006+08:00

♥

kepala botak.

sayang kamu.

sangat.

♥

Jalan Melati 2, Sg.Kantan, Kajang.

29th January 2011

BF.

Tenkiu for coming.

u know that i love u soo muchxx.

nota kaki: ♥ KAMJ. Khairul Azharizan Mohd Jamil. ♥

Sedih

2011-01-31T16:14:00.005+08:00

Sedih

1. Frustrated and giving up

my 1st percentage KPI mcm disaster. macam markah paper Physics masa Form 4. bonus? it just a dream. Mungkin tak ada rezeki lagi. :(utk kes ni, rasa di sabotaj. semua calculation based on system. saat ini aku sudah tidak percaya dengan robot dan machine, kecuali machine ATM yang baik hati keluarkan duit. ( kalau ATM bodo mcm minggu lepas? 3 kali draw, failed to SWITCH. rugi rm3. argh! duit tu! KPI, bonus? redha. Tuhan tak bagi kesenangan pd aku lagi. Mungkin satu hari nanti ada rezeki. Just Hope and Pray. InsyaÁllah.

2. Hometown banjir

Masa banjir dashyat tahun 2006 kut, nasib masa tu dah balik utara. Kali ini, banjir muncul tika aku nak balik selatan. Air sungai yang melimpah-limpah dah memanggil aku. Camane nak balik. Jalan tutup banjir paras lutut, tak pon paras pinggang. Sedih. Mak call tad, dia nak pinjam Hilux Kak Long Erin malam ni nak amik aku sampai nanti. Harap-harap aku selamat sampai. Jangan jadi mcm Maisurya, kene patah balik KL macam dlu sudahlah. Memang melalak. Kalau kene patah balik, tak nak patah balik ke KL la... baik pegi Sg. Gersik, Semerah batu Pahat. boleh kan?

3.Bendera Merah.

Sebabkan delay agak lama, lebih kurang 3 minggu akhirnya ... memang super sakit dan sumpah aku mmg tgh EMO. SUCK.

nota: 4 hari lepas saya menikmati kebahagiaan bersama BF tersayang. tenkiu for coming. 143

The Secret : Everyone has it

2011-01-31T16:09:00.003+08:00

Kalau dah namanya Secret @ Rahsia, perlukah aku tulis dalam entri?

So, blah.

nota: tgh emo ekceli. ok. fine. period pain.

mari bersenam

2011-01-26T22:19:00.011+08:00

bersenam. jangan tak percaya ok? aku mmg bersenam. jogging. kalau menjaga budak kembar yang nakal ni kat taman permainan pun di kira bersenam, sebab peluh keluar kadar sama dengan jogging bulatan Taman Dato Keramat, depan LRT Jelatek tu. seriously. Bila bawak budak kembar bersenam kena plan, sbb kalau tak memang huru hara. Pegi pagi-pagi buta dgn sepupu a.k.a mama diorang la. 1st part, is bawak ke playground. Bila mereka da leka, terus ke track utk jogging dalam 2 round. 2nd part, mama dia pulak jogging. 3rd part, bawak semua berjalan pusing on track. part yang ke 4, terus ke tempat untuk senaman dan macam-macam equipment. exercise penting utk mereka berdua ialah sit up. HAHAHA. budak 2 tahun buat sit up. mengancam siot. kalau aku, semua bantai asalkan dapat rasa setiap satu equipment kt situ. yelah, ramai orang nak guna dan takes turn. lepas penat lelah, keluar peluh. JOM breakfast. ku ingatkan breakfast simple, rupenye BRUNCH. rugi je peluh yang keluar dan lemak yang pecah masa tad. HEHE. konon la. sekali bantai roti canai, nasi lemak, kuih muih, teh tarik. terbaek! ah, cukup. mari lihat gambar kanak-kanak ini.

Lokasi: Taman Dato Keramat, Depan LRT Jelatek.

wawa: penakut naik buaian. keras je. nak suh hayun badan, mmg takkan la. penakut.

jaja: ini budak banyak berani oo. sampai sentap. die sesuka hati naik buaian, hayun badan sesedap rasa. pastu main suke-suke turun. nasib tak tersembam.

bila suruh pandang kamera, pandang seminit je. bila nampak budak lalu lalang, terus hilang panduan. haish. senang betul distract!

masa jalan pusing track nk jogging. mak dia dgn jaja. aku dgn wawa. macam ni la. dia ke depan kita ke belakang. penat weyh.

naik jongkang-jongkit. gambar ni tak de kualiti, tapi sebabkan mereka pandang kamera. maka, ia mahal sedikit.

jaja: hai!

wawa: tgk tuu....

p/s: sekarang 2 kali dalam weekdays ke gym kt office. kalau weekends free, jogging time!

i have my limit

2011-01-25T15:23:00.004+08:00

terima kasih pakcik google.

sumpah saya dah tak larat.

i have my limit.

sabarkah anda jika diperlakukan sebegini setiap hari. di-tuduh dengan apa yang ada tidak lakukan. di maki. di caci. di segala macam la. sabar-kah anda? memang saya bukan seorang yang penyabar tapi lama-lama saya berusaha utk bersabar. tapi, sabar saya ada had-nya.

kalau Tuhan nak balas, Tuhan balas cash aje. What goes around will comes around.

saya masih bersabar dan terus bersabar.

"Seek Allah’s help with patient perseverance and prayer. It is indeed hard except for those who are humble.” (2:45)

kurnia-kan

2011-01-25T11:03:00.004+08:00

counting the days.

lagi beberapa hari je lagi ni. untuk ape? ada la. sumpah tak sabar. sebab dah lama tak jumpa dia. rindu sgt-sgt. eleh eleh.bila dengar lagu kurnia ni teringat kt BF. Mizz Nina dan Noh Hujan nyanyi. konon-konon aku dan BF nyanyi la. if BF nyanyi ok lagi, kalau aku maunya hujan lebat 7 hari 7 malam. suara mengalahkan katak. *mengaku..ok, nah lirik.

Dengarkanlah lagu duluTinggalkanmu itu menungguJangan biarkan hatiDikunci oleh rasa benci
Resah yang tiada hentiBila kau melangkah pergiApakah yang harus ku lakukan‘Tuk merubah hatimu

Chorus
Kurnia bagaikan khayalanTakkan ku lepas walaupun apa yang mendatangKurnia bagaikan khayalanKu takkan lepas walau hanya khayalan
Senyumanmu igauankuTiada yang setandingmuSuara yang bermainMemanggil-manggil namaku
Resah yang tiada hentiBila kau melangkah pergiApakah yang harus ku lakukanUntuk merubah hatimu
Ulang Chorus
Pintaku cuma jangan pergiTak bisa berasingan jauh oh darimu
Bilakah oh nanti akan pergiBerlari biarkan pergiBuat selamanya biar kita berdua disinariOh mentari oh mentari

p/s: i heart u too much.

finger turn blue dan awak ni perasan!

2011-01-22T21:41:00.006+08:00

middle finger turn blue.

ni kes hari minggu haritu la.

image credit to pakcik google.

ini bukan kes lucah atau kes mencarut. baca dulu entri. ok?

harapan sabtu pagi nak bangun lambat, kalau tak pon pegi jogging. tapi, sebabkan malam sebelum itu aku diserang penyakit 'bila tido bilik mak long tanpa amik ubat tido". penyakit tu la aku diserang. mcm biasa la asthma. kalau tido bilik tu je mesti kene. bukan tak nak tido bilik sndiri, tapi sbb bilik sendiri tengah renovate dan habuk merata-rata, terpaksa tido tempat lain. sessi memecahkan dinding dah lama berlaku dari minggu lepas lagi. biarlah. bukan rumah aku.aku hanya tumpang saja. uhuk uhuk. sewa pon tidak perlu bayar baaahh.. waahh.. bagus bangat! ( shut up mai! lagi menyakitkan hati tuan punya rumah ada la.) ok.cukup. berbalik kepada cerita asal. hari sabtu pagi, menjadi apa ya.. tokey kantin, cleaner, cashier dan segala mcam la. makcik aku tokey kantin. hari sabtu skolah, skolah ganti. CNY punya pasal. tolong mana yang perlu, decorate dan kemas-kemas. Al-maklumlah, jabatan kesihatan dah sound 2 3 kali kt makcik aku tu pasal kantin dia. yelah, pekerja 2 je termasuk dia. untung atas-atas pagar je, budak skolah tak ramai. sekolah ren suma lelaki. makan apa la sangat. nak tambah sewa kantin. demand cikgu-cikgu yang loktang nk makan best-best tapi masuk buku tiga lima. macam tah pape perangai. bila lepas sessi rehat, sakan kemas. poster kene tampal dan gantung. amik tukul besi, ketuk paku nk gantung poster. apakah gantung poster pakai paku. padehal boleh je guna tape ke ape, tapi sebab tape suma da habis. terpaksa guna paku dinding, sambil tukul-tukul sekali tertukul jari sendiri. tangan kiri jari tengah. FUCK U. haha. bukan carut. but, middle finger. lama-lama middle finger turn blue. amik ais, terus tuam. habis cerita. tapi sampai skang masih sakit. aah,bukan budak kecil. kamu sudah 25! Waah, kantoi umor! homaigod, enuff mai.

selepas sessi mengemas, ingatkan boleh balik rumah dan tido rehat-rehat.Alangkah bagusnya. tapi, sangkaan meleset. siap kene pergi Carrefour beli-barang dan terus ke Wangsa Walk utk prektis Bowling. OH, masa ni. nasib baik bawak baju extra. memang mencabar main bowling. baling pin bowling sambil dukung budak kembar di sebelah kiri. lantas bola masuk longkang. kalau tak dukung, ajar dia baling bola last-last sangkut kat tengah-tengah. HAHA. nasib abang bowling tu baik. wewett. sambil-sambil main bowling which only me and my kezen aje. her husband jage baby twins. gilir-gilir, kejap bawak jaja keluar pastu letak and bawak wawa pulak. memang penat. ada sorang abang yang berjanggut sikit di dagu membantu menjaga budak kecik kembar. si wawa la nasib tak kesah dgn orang. abang tu berulang kali ulang alik ke tempat aku main. tak pelik tapi aku paham dia cuma kerja nak tgk lane ada problem ke tak. aku tak kesah pon. tapi, bila jadi kisah setiap kali datang ke lane 30 (which is hujung skali) dia akan betul-betul datang dan tegur-tegur sambil pegang baby kembar. berapa kali tah ulang alik. dan bertambah pelik, bila nak balik dan pulangkan kasut. siap kirim salam. tambah-tambah pelik lagi, bila sepupu aku yang pulangkan kasut, dia siap mention kirim salam kt sepupu. sejak bila dia tau aku ni sepupu pd sepupu aku tu. OMG. stalker. HAHA. perasan. yang pasti masa hari kejadian, aku sungguhlah selekeh. :D :D ENUFF mai, jangan perasan ok!!

badan ni dan macam kena pam-pam. memang patut sedar diri la sapa nk usha aku. lagipun, tak pernah mintak dingorat. WTF. so, behave mai.behave.

behave dari pakcik google.

p/s: oh, BFF. saya rindu kamu. eleh. cover.

Lost a warrior

2011-01-19T11:51:00.008+08:00

a figther and a warrior.

fighter for justice? yes! . tapi, pejuang dalam office tingkat 7 Plaza Vads untuk Network Operation Center Ent 1 Banking 2. memang terasa hilang. lagi terasa dari hilang nya Leftenan Adnan. eh, ada kaitan ? WTF. okla. cerita sebenar. tgk gambar bawah. hanya gambar kartun which i'm not sure from where he get and i seriously dont care but all i care is the only picas he use for profile image in his FB.

nama sebenar: tak boleh tulis. bagi nama singkat aje, ayie or aie or whatever the spelling is but still the pronounce as a y i e. ok? and for all he is a man. (kene cakap sbb mangkok Lotter ingat pompuan. mabuk ke ape.)

lahir: utara yang pasti. haha.

status: he's taken to Kak Maz.

about him: he is very humble. super terer. masa awal-awal kerja tak kenal dia, as die office kt customer which currently i'm taking his place now. ok, only just the place the jobs task still maintain like the others in Vads. ok. thats enuff. mari kita cerita pasal dia. bukan benda buruk cuma pada dia hanya yang baik saja. he's not blur but he only appearance seems like blur but his brains is super genius. kalau bila da terer confirm banyak gila ajar bila kita tanya.

what i like about him: he got his own style and for God sake i've been keeping a few of his story and he is also keeping mine.. shh. which we interact tru email and dia sudah macam abang di opis tempat aku meluahkan perasaan sbb yelah sorang-sorang di tempat customer kan? pasal macam-macam la. hal personal pon ada gak sket. tengsss ye boss.

what i call him as warrior: dia memang seorang penyelamat a fighther and a warrior. sumpah. sebabkan ilmu yang penuh di dada, di perut ( ok, boleh lihat perutnya selari dengan badannya HAHA ) dan di otak. apa saja issue dan case die boleh tolong. kalau dia nak counter pon dia terer. obkosla. we all in office all learn from him. seriously. as dia memang expert in this network field. even boss pon xleh nk decide, dia la akan decide. look how superb he is.

reason kenapa dia resign: cuba tanya dia. banyak faktor. dari segi office dan boss yang mengarut. dari segi masa hadapan bersama orang tersayang. dari segi memajukan status diri sendiri dan macam-macam la. (gaya cakap macam aku ni ayie.) enuff mai. he know what the best for him and he already decide. and what ever his decision, we accept it with full of our heart.

pesanan: macam pesanan nak pergi jauh je. semoga berjaya di masa hadapan dan semoga berbahagia dgn orang tersayang. kalau kawin jangan lupa jemput. tak jemput siap! tak ade hadiah nanti! wutever you do, all the best! Amin!

p/s: kena belajar berdikari. u can do it mai.